A LANDLORD IS A PERSON WHO TAKES YOUR MONEY FAST.
HE SERVES A LEASE UPON YOU AND YOU HAVE A HOME AT LAST.
ON SIGNING YOU AGREE TO DO THE RIGHT THINGS AND RESPECT.
HIS PROPERTY AND THEN KEEP IT CLEAN MAKING NO DEFECTS.
ANYTHING ON THE PROPERTY WHICH GOES WRONG IF IT BREAKS.
YOU HAVE TO RING AND TELL HIM SO REPAIRS HE UNDERTAKES.
NOW DECENT PEOPLE SIGN THERE LEASE AND MOST THEY KEEP THERE WORD.
LOOK AFTER WHATS NOT RIGHTLY THIERS AS YOU WILL HAVE HEARD.
SO WHY WHEN TENANTS FIND A FAULT HE DOESN'T WANT TO KNOW.
NO MATTER HOW MANY TIMES ONE RINGS THE GOING IS SO SLOW.
AN EXAMPLE HERE I'M TELLING YOU LAST WEEK WHEN I GOT HOME.
FRIDAY MORNING NO HOT WATER YES IT MADE ME MOAN.
TWO SUITCASES OF WASHING AND NOT A SINGLE DROP.
OF WATER FROM MY TAPS NO I JUST COULDN'T GET IT HOT.
A BROKEN BOILER WAS THE FAULT SO THE LANDLORD I DID RING.
ONLY TO FIND AN ANSWER MACHINE LEAVE YOUR MESSAGE AFTER THE PING.
IT'S EASY ENOUGH SO YES I SPOKE DOWN THE PHONELINE PLAIN.
LEFT MY ADDRESS AND MY NUMBER AND OF COURSE MY NAME.
WAITED ALL DAY FRIDAY BUT NO ANSWER DID I GET.
FRUSTRAITED NOW BY THE END OF THE DAY YES I WAS YOU BET.
MY KETTLE HAD NO BACKSIDE (BUTT) LEFT FOREVER ON THE BOIL.
WASHING SMALLS AND OTHER THINGS MOTHERHEN DID TOIL.
SATURDAY CAME AROUND AND ONCE AGAIN I RANG UP QUICK.
AT THE END OF THE DAY NO REPLY DON'T IT MAKE YOU SICK.
ON SUNDAY SAME AGAIN I THOUGHT WHAT DO I DO NOW.
THREE FULL DAYS OF RINGING UP I DIDN'T JUST KNOW HOW.
I COULD GET THE REPAIR DONE IF THE LANDLORD COULDN'T FIND TIME.
TO RING ME BACK AND ANSWER ME ON MY OWN LANDLINE.
BLOODY IGNORANT USELESS A FEW OF THE WORKS I SPOKE.
TO MYSELF IN ANGER BECAUSE THIS WAS NO JOKE.
BOILING PANS AND KETTLES CLIMBING STAIRS POOR KATH.
TO KEEP MYSELF NICE AND CLEAN FOR A NICE HOT BATH.
MONDAY CAME AROUND AND HOW I ACHED FROM TOP TO TOE.
MY ANKLE NOW HAD GONE WITH CARRYING WATER TOO AND FRO.
SO I RANG AGAIN YES MORE EXPENCE THIS TIME TO TELL HIM THAT.
MY STANDING ORDERS CANCELLED FOR MY RENT YOU HEAR OLD CHAP.
JUST A LITTLE WHITE LIE IT MIGHT MAKE HIM SIT UP.
WHEN HE LISTENED TO THIS MESSAGE AS HE SIPPED HIS COFFEE CUP.
TUESDAY MORNING NO SUPRIZE A MESSAGE HE HAD SENT.
IVE ARRANGED A MAN TO CALL PM BECAUSE I NEED MY RENT.
MY LITTLE LIE HAD FINALLY WORKED SO OFF MOTHERHEN DID LIMP.
DOWN TO TOWN FOR SOME SHOPPING CLOTHES SOAKING IN THE SINK.
AT 4PM A GUY RANG UP SAID HE WOULD CALL NEXT DAY. GRRRR!!!
BY WEDNESDAY I WAS SHATTERED STRESSED OUT IN A BAD WAY.
HE DIDN'T ARRIVE TILL THURSDAY AND JUST AS I HAD SAT.
DOWN TO EAT MY HOMEMADE STEW WITH THIS I COULD HAVE SPAT.
WHAT A TIME TO CALL I THOUGHT SO MY LUNCH WENT TO ONE SIDE.
I WASN'T EATING IN FRONT OF A STRANGER NO I HAVE MORE PRIDE.
I ASKED HIM WHEN THE LANDLORD HAD LET HIM KNOW MY NEED.
HE SAID THE DAY I CALLED YOU SO I CAME ALONG WITH SPEED.
HOW COULD HE LIE AND TELL ME HE HAD LET HIM KNOW BEFORE.
I LOST MY MARBLES THERE AND THEN AND HE HEARD HOW MUCH I SWORE.
WELL THANX A MILLION I REPLIED AND THEN I TOLD HIM STRAIGHT.
HOW MANY MESSAGES I HAD LEFT AND OF MY SEVEN DAY WAIT.
OH! DEAR HE SAID I KNOW THESE LANDLORDS YOU ARE RIGHT MADAM.
THEY'LL GET AWAY WITH MURDER ANYTIME THEY CAN.
MY BOILERS MENDED NOW FRIENDS AND I'M NOW BACK TO THE NORM.
RED HOT WATER FROM MY TAP INSTEAD OF BEING LUKE WARM.
MY NERVES ARE CALMED BUT STILL I SAY THAT LANDLORDS ARE A FARSE.
BEING FACE TO FACE I WOULD HAVE SAID STICK YOUR ANSWER MACHINE UP YOUR ARSE.
SO IF YOU ARE A LANDLORD AND THERES MESSAGES ON YOUR LINE.
FLIPPING ANSWER THEM WILL YOU IF YOU READ "MY SIMPLE RHYME"
15 comments:
Oh poor Kath how very frustrating for you dear ,no hot water for washing, bathing etc ,its funny how the threat of no rent made him react to your calls ,so now you have all the ironing from your washing spree,hope you are well ..love Jan xx
I am at my grumpiest without hot water. Been trying to economise recently, and very miserable it is too. So I understand your fury, Kath. Glad you're back `on the boil, again. You tell `em!
Bunny xx
Oh Kath, I know it's not funny, but you did make me laugh when you wrote the worse arse, lol. Landlords sure don't mind taking your money, but boys oh boys when it comes time for them to pay out a bit, they like to take their time! It's not fair is it. I am glad you now have the problem fixed, but am sorry that you had to wait so long. How frustrating for you! (((hugs)))
Marie
http://ayearatoakcottage.blogspot.com/
That was a really neat poem Kath! Funny... but yet not funny! I would have been just like you! The repair man would have found me in a bad mood! It would have been like waking up a "sleeping lion!". Hope you have a wonderful week with blessings. Hugs, Janie
Don't they make you mad. They're quick enough to take your money.You should have taken your clothes to the launderette and sent him the bill.
Glad you're all sorted now Kath.
B. x
Landlords are a shady bunch, but owning a home can be frustrating as well. You can't win! grrrrr
Russ
Great poem and I am glad you got your boiler fixed in the end.
true, a large percentage of landlords just don't care, only want to get the rent money!!! GRRR
glad you got the boiler fixed finally.
have a good wkend my friend.
i think of you often.
hugs & love,
sugar
OH KATH....WHILE I FEEL YOUR 'PAIN'...I HAVE TO ADMIT THAT I AM LAUGHING MY ARSE OFF TOO!!!!! I LOVE YOUR WORDING AND WOULD HAVE LOVED TO HEAR YOU RANT!!!!
LOVE,
CARLENE
Just dropped in to say 'Hello!
and what a calamity for you, hope things are now 'tickety boo'
Thanks for your recent 'visit' to mine.
Take care, and mind how you go!
Love 'n Hugs
Aileen....X
I am so glad you finally got your hot water fixed. Being ignored by him had to upset you greatly. At least the plumber that came was on your side and did a good repair. Thank you for your comment in my journal as I have been slow to answer. I hope your condition with falling down is getting better as I am worried for you. I am slowly doing my work on my home, and then all I want to do is rest. I am finally on the computer a few hours to thank my readers. Having such positive comments is a great source of encouragement. My surgery to my lumbar is doing fine. The weather changes effect me greatly as I have arthritis to my entire spine. I will let you know more soon. Thought's for your well being - mark
You poor thing. Not having hot water all that time. What a distressing time for you. Glad all is well now and you can have a good long hot soak in the bubble bath to cure some of those aches. It is one of my favorite things to do. We never know just how much we appreciate something til we don't have it. 'On Ya' - ma
Honestly, Kath, that is a darned shame. I'm glad you told him you were renting anymore. You really shouldn't have to go that far to get something fixed. I've always thought I would like to give up my home and all the repairs to lease but then I hear of horror stories like yours and the landlord just ignoring the repairs. Of course, I found myself a good plumber but it was hard to find people to come here promptly to fix things for me. Ugh....a week without hot water. Glad it's all sorted out. Love xx Chris
Hi Kath ,glad at last you got the boiler fixed ,how awful to be without hot water for all that time ...take care ...love Jeanxx
There is no excuse for his behavior and he gives good landlords a bad name. I see the thought of not getting his money on time triggered him into action. I would hold his money a few days for the aggrevation - teach him Motherhen is not one to toy with. I howled with laughter about sticking the answering machine.
xxx
Lisa
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