I WOKE IN THE NIGHT AND COULDN'T GET BACK TO SLEEP.
I TOSSED AND I TURNED AND I TRIED COUNTING SHEEP.
STILL I JUST COULDN'T GET SETTLED BACK DOWN.
SO I TWISTED THE DUVET AROUND AND AROUND.
FIRST PULLED IT THIS WAY AND THEN PULLED IT THAT.
THEN I THOUGHT TO MYSELF OH! MY PILLOWS TOO FLAT.
I PUFFED THREE TOGETHER THEN FOUND THEM TOO HIGH.
MY NECK IT WAS ACHEING I BREATHED OUT A SIGH.
OH! I'LL GET UP AND MAKE A NICE CUP OF TEA.
ADD A TEASPOON OF BRANDY TO HELP RELAX ME.
ON MAKEING MY WAY THROUGH THE HALL TO THE LOO.
I TRIPPED UP AND FELL OVER MY OLD PAIR OF SHOES.
STUMPED MY BIG TOE AND GAVE OUT A YELL.
WHEN I SAT ON THE LOO IT STARTED TO SWELL.
WHAT WITH THE SORE ANKLE AND NOW MY BIG TOE.
I WAS FEELING QUITE GRIM WITH THE TOE SWELLING SO.
I DECIDED I MUST GIVE THEM BOTH A GOOD SOAK.
HOPEING THIS WEEK ALSO MY TOE WASN'T BROKE.
AS MY ACCIDENT LAST WEEK LEFT ME WITH A HOBBLE.
NOW MY BIG TOE I'M ON A KIND OF A WOBBLE.
FILLED UP THE BOWL AND I DID A QUICK TWIST.
THEN I SEEMED TO FEEL SOMETHING CLICK IN MY WRIST.
THE WATER IT STARTED TO SPILL OR'E THE SIDE.
ONTO ME AND THE FLOOR AND I STARTED TO SLIDE.
SLIPPING AND SKIDDING I FELL IN A FLASH.
THE WATER TEAMED OVER AND I FELT A BIG SPLASH.
ARMS IN THE AIR I REACHED OUT TO GRAB.
HOLD OF THE CHAIR BUT I MISSED AND WENT MAD
THE BOWL HAD TIPPED ALL OF IT'S CONTENTS ON ME.
A SIGHT FOR SORE EYES GLAD KNOWONE SAWME.
DRIPPING WET THROUGH LIKE A DROUNDED RAT.
I WAS MORE CONCERNED ABOUT THE DOWNSTAIRS FLAT.
QUICK GRAB SOME TOWELS I THOUGHT TO MOP UP.
MY TEA HAD GONE COLD BY NOW IN THE CUP.
WATER WAS EVERYWHERE OVER THE FLOOR.
IT STARTED TO SEEP UNDER MY LAUNDRY DOOR.
I GRABBED FOR THE TOWELS FROM A CUBOARD QUITE NEAR.
WHEN I DID THE SPLITS AND SLIPPED BANGING MY EAR.
ON THE HANDLE OF THE OVEN JUST TO MY RIGHT.
I CAUGHT MY REFLECTION IN THE MIRROR WHAT A SIGHT.
MY HAIR WAS WET THROUGH MY NIGHTDRESS AS WELL.
MY ANKLE WAS THROBBING AND MY TOE NOW WELL SWELL.
I FELT LIKE I'D HAD A GOOD CLIP ROUND THE EAR.
THINKING BLIMEY IV'E BEEN KNOCKED INTO NEXT YEAR.
I WASN'T GETTING FAR SO THE TOWELS I THREW DOWN.
STOOD THERE ARMS FOLDED ON MY FACE A BIG FROWN.
ALL THIS BECAUSE I COULDN'T GET TO SLEEP.
THINKING NEXT TIME I'LL CARRY ON COUNTING SHEEP.
YOU KNOW ME BY NOW AND I DO LIKE A LAUGH.
WELL IT WASN'T VERY FUNNY SO I RAN A HOT BATH.
I FILLED IT WITH BUBBLES AND LAID DOWN TO SOAK.
THE WATER SO HIGH I HOPED I DIDN'T CHOKE.
AS I LAY THERE AND WONDERED ABOUT THIS AND THAT.
I SAID TO MYSELF I LOVE MY DEAR FLAT.
IT OVERLOOKS THE SEA WITH A PADDLE IN VIEW.
AND I CAN PADDLE AS WELL IN MY KITCHEN TOO.
WAKEING EACH DAY AT THE CRACK OF DAWN .
THEN ALL OF A SUDDEN I STARTED TO YAWN.
THE NEXT THING I KNEW I WOKE UP FEELING FINE.
I'D DRIFTED TO SLEEP IN THE BATH IT WAS NINE.
SONEXT TIME I CARN'T SLEEP IV'E FOUND ME A CURE.
I'LL SPILL A BOWL OF WATER ON MY KITCHEN FLOOR.
STUMP MY BIG TOE AND BANG MY LEFT EAR.
THEN MAYBE WHO KNOWS I MIGHT SLEEP TILL NEXT YEAR.
I'M TAKEING THINGS STEADY NOW ONE DAY AT A TIME.
I'M GLAD I'M STILL HERE THOUGH TO WRITE
"MY SIMPLE RHYME" .
HAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!
Astoriasand.