"FIRE IN THE FLAT"

 

 

I WAS HARD AND FAST  ASLEEP THIS MORNING ROUND ABOUT HALF PAST THREE.

 

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN CAME A VERY LOUD PIERCING SCREAMING NOISE IT SOUNDED TO ME. 

 

I WAS HALF ASLEEP AND BOGEYED AND I WONDERED WHERE IT CAME FROM.

 

WHEN PARTNER JUMPED OUT OF BED SO QUICK AND SAID COME ON MOTHERHEN QUICK RUN.

 

RUN I SAID WHERE TO AT THIS TIME  3-30AM DON'T BE DAFT .

 

THERES A FIRE IN THE FLAT HE SHOUTED THATS THE ALARM COME ON LAUGHING KATH.

 

MY GOD I YELLED AND I GRABBED MY DRESSING GOWN FIRST THOUGH I TOOK MY PURSE.

 

IF THERE WAS A FIRE I WANTED OUR  BANK CARDS AND THIS IS WHAT I THOUGHT OF FIRST. HE-HE.

 

WELL WE RAN OUT THE FLAT AND DOWN THE STEPS AND WHEN WE GOT OUTSIDE.

 

I HAVE NEVER SEEN ANYTHING LIKE IT  IF IT WERE ME I WOULD HAVE HAD TO HIDE.

 

YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN SOME OF THE CREATIONS THAT THE FIRE ALARM WOKE UP.

 

I DON'T MAKE FUN OF PEOPLE AND  I DON'T USUALLY TALK ABOUT STUFF.

 

BUT I WAS SO SHOCKED I WAS STOOD THERE FROZEN AND I WAS QUITE WELL EQUIPPED .

 

IN A NICE NIGHTDRESS AND WARM DRESSING GOWN BUT SOME OF THEM HAD ON NO KIT. HE-HE.

 

STOOD IN THE ROAD WAS A WOMAN WITH A VERY FLIMSY SILK SHORT GOWN.

 

AND HER BOOBS WERE SHOWING THROUGH THE MATERIAL HUNG TO HER WAIST RIGHT DOWN.

 

A MAN STOOD BESIDE HER WAS WEARING A THONG AND I THOUGHT GOOD GRIEF HE WILL FREEZE.

 

WHEN SOMEONE OFFERED HIM A BLANKET HE SAID OH I DON'T MIND YES PLEASE.

 

THE SCREAMING NOISE WAS ECHOING OUT AND PIECING MY EARS REAL BAD.

 

I STARTED TO CRY BECAUSE I WAS THINKING THIS IS GOING TO END UP SAD.

 

I AM  JUST ABOUT TO LOSE EVERYTHING APART FROM WHATS IN MY PURSE.

 

AND MY POOTER WILL BE GONE AND I WON'T BE ABLE TO WRITE YOU ANY MORE VERSE. HE-HE

 

I WAS PRAYING TO GOD THAT EVERYONE GOT OUT AND REALY UPSET WAS I.

 

THE ROOSTER WAS CUDDLING ME AND TRYING TO REASURE ME AS HE WIPED DRY MY EYE.

 

A GUY CAME OVER CALLED ELVIS HE IS THE CARETAKER OF THE BLOCK.

 

AND HE IS SHOUTING OUT TO EVERYONE  ARE YOU ALL OK OLD COCKS.

 

WHEN A GUY IN SOME PALE BLUE LONG JOHNS SAID WHERES THE BLOODY FIRE BRIGADE. HE-HE

 

HE REPLIED OH WE DON'T NEED THEM SORRY IT'S A SILLY MISTAKE I HAVE MADE.

 

MISTAKE ALL THESE VOICES WERE SHOUTING WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THAT.

 

WELL IV'E BEEN FOR A PINT TO A BIT OF A DO IT WAS LATE WHEN I GOT BACK TO MY FLAT.

 

I GOT INSIDE AND I MADE SOME TOAST AND I BURNT IT YOU SEE AND SO.

 

THE ALARM IT SET OFF AND IT GOES TO EVERYONE TO LET ALL THE WHOLE BLOCK KNOW.

 

THERES A FIRE IN THE FLATS  AND SO WHEN I RAN OUT I COULDNT' REMEMBER THE CODE.

 

TO STOP THE ALARM AND BEFORE I KNEW IT ALL THE STREET HAD OVERFLOWED.

 

WITH   PEOPLE LIKE YOU STOOD ABOUT IN THERE NIGHTWARE AND NOW I HAVE JUST RANG UP.

 

THE LANDLORD TO ASK IF HE CAN COME OUT SO  INTO THE ALARM HE'LL PUT.

 

THE CODE TO STOP IT SCREAMING THEN YOU CAN ALL GO BACK TO BED.

 

WELL ONE FELLOW SHOUTED YOU WANT SACKING MATE YOUR NOT RIGHT IN YOUR BLOODY  HEAD HE-HE.

 

SO MY TEARS THEY TURNED TO LAUGHTER AND I JUST COULDN'T STOP AT ALL.

 

I WAS LOOKING ROUND AT THE FANCY GEAR IT WAS BETTER THAN A  RAGTIME BALL. HE-HE.

 

LONG JOHNS AND SHORTY NIGHTIES BRIEFS AND THONGS AND STUFF.

 

ONE WOMAN HAD A BIG BAGGY JUMPER ON AND A PAIR OF JOGGERS SHE LOOKED  ROUGH.

 

SHE KEPT SAYING THIS IS THE FIRST TIME I'VE SLEPT IN THESE JOGGERS BUT I'M COLD.

 

I KNOW I LOOK A MESS BUT WHO CARES SHE SAID I'M ALWAYS FROZEN NOW I'M OLD.

 

I AM SUCH A GIDDY PERSON AND THE ROOSTER WAS PLAYING POP.

 

BECAUSE I COULDN'T STOP LAUGHING AT ALL THESE FOLKS BUT I COULDN'T STOP.

 

BY THIS TIME I WAS PERISHED AND SOME STOOD  THEY DIDN'T HAVE A CARE.

 

BUT WE COULDN'T GO INSIDE BECAUSE THE ALARM WOULD HAVE DAMAGED OUR EAR DRUMS BACK IN THERE.

 

I HAVE NEVER HEARD SUCH A PIERCING SOUND AS STRONG AS THIS BEFORE.

 

AND LET ME SAY I AM HOPING AFTER LAST NIGHT I NEVER HERE IT ANYMORE.

 

PARTNER WAS GETTING AGGREVATED AND I KNEW THAT HE WAS ANNOYED.

 

BECAUSE HE IS THE ONLY ONE WHO WORKS YOU SEE ALL THE OTHERS ARE NOT EMPLOYED .

 

OUR BLOCK IS FULL OF  INVALID OR FOLKS RETIRED TO THE COAST  YOU SEE.

 

AND ALL HE KEPT SAYING WAS IT'S OK FOR THEM THEY DON'T HAVE TO GO TO WORK LIKE ME.

 

AT 6-30AM IN THE MORNING AND HE WAS WISHING  THE LANDLORD WOULD SOON COME.

 

AND HURRY UP AND TURN IT OFF ALL TOWN WILL WONDER WHERE THE NOISE IS FROM.

 

WELL EVENTUALLY HE CAME AND HE TURNED IT OFF SO WE WENT INSIDE AT LAST.

 

AND BEFORE WE KNEW IT IT WAS HALF PAST SIX AND THREE HOURS HAD ALREADY PAST.

 

SO PARTNER WENT TO WORK AS USUAL AND AS THE TIME DID PASS.

 

ALL I COULD DO WAS LAUGH TO MYSELF AT THIS GUY IN THE THONG AND THAT OLD LASS.

 

I THOUGHT TO MYSELF FLIPPING HECK WE HAVE KINKIES IN OUR BLOCK LIVING HERE.

 

TWO MIDDLE AGED PEOPLE IN THERE FIFTIES GOING TO BED IN THAT KIND OF GEAR. HE-HE.

 

ANYWAY FOLKS THANK GOODNESS IT WAS ALL A FALSE ALARM.

 

AND LAUGHING KATH AND EVERYONE ELSE DIDN'T COME TO ANY  HARM.

 

BUT ROOSTER SAID TO ELVIS WHEN WE WERE COMING INSIDE.

 

DON'T MAKE ANY MORE TOAST WHEN YOUR GASSED UP OR I'M GOING TO KICK YOUR BACKSIDE.   HE-HE.

 

SO FOR NOW I MUST RUSH AS I AM STILL MAKING THINGS FOR THIS CHRISTMAS TIME.

 

BUT I JUST THOUGHT I'D POP ONLINE AND TELL THE LATEST HERE IN " MY SIMPLE RHYME "  HE-HE.

 

 

                       SO THIS HAD TO BE MISSED TODAY LOL!!!!

 

                                                                  

                                                     

 

                                                 HE-HE -HE  !!!!!!!

 

      

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

" THE CHRISTMAS TREE"

               

            

                  

        

NEXT SATURDAY  I'M PREPARING FOR AS THEN A BUSY MONTH STARTS.

 

THE FIRST OF DECEMBER  IS WHEN I REALY  HAVE TO PLAY MY PART.

 

THE REAL LEAD UP TO CHRISTMAS AND I'M  BUSY AS A BEE.

 

CLEANING DOWN AND MOVING ROUND TO FIT IN THE CHRISTMAS TREE.

 

I CANNOT BELIEVE HOW THIS YEAR HAS FLOWN DOESN'T TIME PASS  QUICK.

 

SO I'M NOW SORTING OUT AND LOOKING THROUGH MY CHRISTMAS BOX OF TRICKS.

 

BAUBLES AND ANGELS SILVER TWINE BEADS THAT GLITTER SO.

 

I WONDER WHEN I'LL FINISH I REALY DO NOT KNOW.

 

DOESN'T IT TAKE QUITE A TIME TO HANG THESE PRETTY THINGS .

 

ON EVERY BRANCH AND THREAD THEM ALL ON STRANDS OF GLITTERY STRINGS.

 

SILVER  GOLD OR COTTON GREEN SO THAT IT DOESN'TSHOW.

 

I LIKE MY BAUBLES AND DECORATED  PIECES TO SWING DOWN VERY  LOW.

 

NOT SO TIGHT ON THE BRANCHES WITH THERE SELF FORMED  LITTLE HOOKS .

 

IF YOU PLACE THESE STRAIGHT ONTO THE BRANCH THEY DON'T DANGLE VERY MUCH.

 

ALL COLOURS I HAVE SORTED LOTS OF THE SPARKLY KIND.

 

GLASS ONES YOU CAN SEE THROUGH AND THE OLD VICTORIAN KIND.

 

I MAKE SOME LITTLE PRESENTS OUT OF TINY BOXES SMALL.

 

AND MINATURE CHRISTMAS CRACKERS I MAKE TO HAND AROUND TO ALL.

 

POPPING IN A TINY GIFT JUST A LITTLE THING.

 

A PUZZLE FOR THE BOYS AND FOR THE GIRLS A PRETTY RING.

 

I LAY THEM ACROSS THE BRANCHES TO FILL UP ALL THE GAPS.

 

AND BY THE TREE A FANCY CARTON FILLEDWITHPARTY HATS.

 

LITTLE RED KNITTED STOCKINGS HANG FROM MY FIREPLACE SHELF.

 

WITH TINY CHOCOLATE PIECES IN BUT THESE ARE FOR MYSELF.     HE-HE.

 

I BOUGHT THESE MANY YEARS  AGO WHEN MY CHILDREN  THEY WERE SMALL.

 

AND THEY HAVE ALWAYS BEEN MY FAVOUTIRE PIECES OF  THEM ALL.

 

GINGERBREAD MEN WRAPPED UP IN CELLOPHANE DANCE AS I WALK BYE .

 

PRESENTS  AND  FLICKERING CANDLES ALSO CATCH MY EYE.

 

I HAVE MADE A LOVELY BRIGHT RED SACK  FROM AN EMPTY BROWN POTATO BAG.

 

COVERED IT IN RED CREPE PAPER AND STOOD THERE IT IS CLAD.

 

ON THE FRONT A PICTURE OF SANTA AND INSIDE A STORAGE BIN.

 

WITH GIFTS IV'E WRAPPED ALL NUMBERED FOR ALL MY GUESTS TO WIN.

 

IT WILL LOOK JUST  LIKE A STRONG RED SACK STANDING UPRIGHT THERE.

 

I DARN'T RISK POPPING IT FULL OF GOODIES NEXT TO MY PARTNERS CHAIR.   HE-HE.

 

WHEN VISITORS  WIN A GAME OUTRIGHT A NUMBER THEN THEY CHOOSE.

 

LARGE ONES FOR THE WINNERS SOME SMALL FOR THOSE WHO LOSE.

 

THE NUMBER CHOSEN BY THEMSELVES SO THATS THERE PROBLEM THEN.

 

IF THEY DON'T GET A GIFT THAT THERE FOND OF THEY CARN'T BLAME  " OLD MOTHERHEN" " HE-HE.

 

LOT OF GAMES I PLAN AT CHRISTMAS WHICH TAKE HOURS TO MAKE.

 

I LIKE MY GUESTS TO HAVE SOMETHING WHEN THEY GO HOME TO TAKE.

 

I CUT OUT ADVERTISEMENTS AND HANG THEM UP ALL AROUND .

 

CUT OFF THE NAME OF THE PRODUCT AND WHEN THE GUESTS HAVE FOUND .

 

THEY HAVE TO WRITE THE ANSWERS ON A PAPER AND WHEN THERE DONE.

 

I CHECK THEM ALL AND ADD UP THE SCORES THEY LIKE THIS GAME IT'S FUN.

 

THE ONES WITH THE MOST CORRECT THEY GET THE CHOISE OF A GIFT FROM THE SACK.

 

AND IT'S TOUGH IF THE LADY GETS UNDERPANTS AND THE MEN GET A BEAUTY FACE PACK..

 

BECAUSE WE HAVE A RIGHT LAUGH WHEN THEY OPEN AND LOOK WHOO -HOO.

 

LOTS OF GAMES I MAKE UP MYSELF AND THEY ALL ENJOY THEM TOO.

 

I LOVE THE PREPERATION AND LEAD UP TO CHRISTMASTIME.

 

IV'E FOUND TIME VERY LIMITED THIS YEAR THOUGH I SEEM TO BE ALWAYS ONLINE.    HE-HE.

 

 

IF I COULD TRIM UP MY COMMENTS TO YOU THAT WOULD BE REALY NICE.

 

A LITTLE DIFFERANT I'D LOVE TO  DO THAT AND FOR YOU A NICE SUPRIZE.

 

ARE YOU READY TO TRIM UP  J/LAND IS  YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE UP YET.

 

IT MIGHT BE A LITTLE EARLY BUT I'VE LOTS STILL TO DO AND GET .

 

MY SNOWMAN  IS ALSO GOING TO BE PLACED SOMEWHERE THERE ON SHOW.

 

IV'E MADE A BOARD TO STAND HIM ON WHICH I HAVE SPRAYED WITH SNOW.

 

HE STANDS ABOUT TWELVE INCHES HIGH AND HE'S CAUGHT A FALLING STAR.

 

BACK HOME WHERE I USED TO LIVE HE USED TO STAND WELCOMING FOLKS TO MY  BAR.

 

RUDOLPH WILL BE  LIT IN THE WINDOW TOO RIDING INTO THE SKY.

 

FOR EVERY VISITOR TO OUR TOWN TO SEE AS THEY  PASS HIM  BY.

 

NEWCOMERS TO MY JOURNAL WON'T UNDERSTAND THE NEXT LINES.

 

IF YOU HAVN'T READ MY ARCHIVES OF SOME OF MY PAST TIMES.

 

WELL MY OLD J/LAND FOLLOWERS I'M READY TO FILL MY GOLD DISH.

 

WITH LOTS OF JUICY SATSUMAS AND YOU ALREADY KNOW I DON'T  MISS.   HE- HE.

 

IN THE HALL I'LL DECORATE THE TROLLEY (SIDETABLE) FOR ALL THE GOODIES AND SWEETS.

 

AND  IN MY NEXT RHYME I'LL TELL YOU ABOUT ALL MY CHRISTMAS TREATS.

 

MY LARGE VICTORIAN STAIRCASE OUTSIDE I ALSO LIKE TO TRIM.

 

WITH GARLANDS ON THE HANDRAILS AND OTHER PRETTY THINGS.

 

LIVING ON THE SECOND FLOOR I ALSO PLACE A TREE.

 

WITH TWINKLING LIGHTS FOR VISITORS WHEN THEY CALL IN TO SEE  ME.

 

MY KITCHEN THEN  COMES LAST OF ALL AND IN HERE MY POOTER LIVES.

 

SO A NICE CLEAN UP FOR HIM AS WELL AND SOMETHING CHRISTMASY I'LL GIVE.

 

MAYBE A LITTLE SANTA ON TOP FOR ME TO WISPER AND SAY

 

 

IV'E BEEN A GOOD GIRL SANTA DON'T FORGET MOTHERHEN CHRISTMAS DAY.   HE-HE.

 

SO YES THIS NEXT THREE  WEEKS YOU  SEE I HAVE A VERY LOT ON.

 

IT TAKES ME AGES TO TRIM UP MY FLAT  BUT WORTH IT WHEN I'M DONE.

 

I HOPE YOU ENJOY YOUR DECORATIONS WHEN ALL COMPLETE LIKE ME.

 

SCATTERED ALL AROUND YOU AND UNDER YOUR CHRISTMAS TREE.

 

THE FINAL TOUCHES ON CHRISTMAS EVE COME  FROM SON  IN THE USA .

 

AN ARRANGEMENT OF BEAUTIFUL FLOWERS  WILL STAND PRIDE OF PLACE IN MY BAY.....

 

I BEST GO DO MY HALL NOW FRIENDS IT'S HARD WORK IS DECEMBER TIME.

 

WHEN FINISHED  I'LL PLACE YOU SOME PICTURES IN ANOTHER OF  " MY SIMPLE RHYME."

 

 

              

 

 

                         KATH           ENJOY!!!

 

 

" I HAD AN IDEA"

 

              

 

                                      OVER SIXTIES LOL!!

                                                 

                                              

   

I WAS SNAGGING THESE GRAPHICS ABOVE FROM SUGAR ONE MORNING WHEN I WAS ONLINE.

 

YES THESE LOVELY RED HATTER TAGS LIKE ABOVE AND I GOT THE IDEA FOR THIS RHYME.

 

I WOULD LOVE TO BE A RED HATTER GIRL AND TRAVEL AROUND AND HAVE LAUGHS.

 

I THINK THIS WOULD SUIT ME TO A TEE  A RED HAT ON MY HEAD LAUGHING KATH.

 

WELL ACTUALY I DO HAVE A PICTURE OF MYSELF IN MY BIG RED HAT.

 

SO I MIGHT WRITE UP TO SOMEONE AND SEND IT  AND ASK ABOUT THAT.

 

COULD I JOIN YOUR RED HATTER GROUP PLEASE I'D ASK AS I'D LOVE TO TRAVEL AROUND.

 

AND MY LAUGH IT IS VERY INFECTIOUS IT'S A VERY VERY HEARTY SOUND.

 

I AM SURE I WOULD FIT IN COMFORTABLY WITH YOUR GROUP PLEASE GIVE ME A TRY.

 

HERE IS MY PICTURE ENCLOSED FOR YOU IN MY RED HAT I AWAIT YOUR REPLY.

 

CAN YOU IMAGINE ME J/LAND GOING OUT TO A FUNCTION WITH ALL OF THEM.

 

INTRODUCING MYSELF TO THEM ALL AND SAYING HELLO GALS I'M MOTHEREHEN.      HE-HE.

 

I'M OVER SIXTY  AND JUST THE RIGHT AGE AND I THINK STILL A KID AT HEART.

 

AND I ALSO HAVE A PURPLE DRESS I COULD WEAR AND PLAY THE PART.

 

IF I JOINED IN YOUR GROUP WHAT FUN WE WOULD HAVE YOU WOULD LAUGH FROM MORNING TILL NIGHT.

 

BECAUSE MOTHERHEN LOVES A LAUGH AND GOOD FUN I THINK I  WOULD FIT IN JUST RIGHT.

 

SO PLEASE  CONSIDER MY APPLICATION  IF YOU ARE ONE SHORT IN YOUR GROUP.

 

IV'E ENQUIRED ROUND HOME AND KNOWBODY SEEMS TO WANT TO GET UP A NEW TROOP.

 

FROM MY AREA SO I'LL HAVE TO WAIT FOR A VACANCY IF I CAN JOIN ONE OF YOURS.

 

OH I WOULD BE EVER SO GRATEFUL TO YOU AS MOTHERHEN JUST SIMPLY ADORES.

 

ANY KIND OF LARGE HAT YOU SEE BUT A RED ONE I ALREADY POSSESS.

 

I WOULD LOOK NICE I'M SURE WHEN DOLLED UP AND OF COURSE IN A PURPLE DRESS.

 

SO FOR NOW HERE IS MY PICTURE ENCLOSED WHICH I'VE SENT YOU WITH THESE FEW LINES..

 

BUT MY HAIRS NO LONGER DARK BROWN IT'S BLONDE AND HAS BEEN FOR QUITE SOME TIME.

 

IF I HAVE A SHORT WAIT THATS FINE I DON'T MIND BEFORE YOU GET BACK TO ME..

 

OH!!!!   ON SECOND THOUGHTS THOUGH DON'T BOTHER AS IT MIGHT PROVE TOO MUCH  HE-HE..

 

IV'E DECIDED I MUCH RATHER SPEND MY TIME WITH THE GROUP I HAVE ALREADY  MET.

 

WHICH TAKES UP LOTS OF MY SPARE TIME SO NO TIME FOR OTHER GROUPS  YET.

 

I'M FAR TOO BUSY DOING THINGS IN THIS ONE AND OFTEN I CARN'T GET OFFLINE.

 

FOR WRITING MY COMMENTS AND POSTINGS TO J/LAND ALL OF "  MY SIMPLE RHYMES " 

 

                                            

                                  

 

 

                             I CAN DREAM CARN'T I ?  HE-HE-HE.

 

 

 

" THE HUNK I MET IN GREECE"

 

 

     

 

 

MY STORY TODAY IS ABOUT ONE YEAR I FLEW AWAY OVER TO GREECE.

 

I WAS SICK OF THE USUAL ROUTINE WE DO AND WANTED A BIT OF PEACE.

 

SO OFF I HOPPED AWAY MY FRIENDS TO MY  IDILIC PLACE.

 

SKIATHOS TO SIT AROUND AND SUNBATHE AND DO EVERYTHING AT MY  PACE.

 

I HADN'T BEEN THERE VERY LONG MY FRIENDS WHEN  RELAXING I SPIED WITH MY EYE.

 

A GROUP OF GUYS GOOD LOOKING All TANNED AND IN THE MIDDLE OF THEM OH! MY.

 

ONE BIG AND HUNKY NOT SO TANNED BUT JUST RIGHT AND SOLID AND STRONG.

 

SO I KEPT LOOKING OVER AND EYEING UP WELL I WASN'T DOING NO WRONG.

 

AND EACH DAY I WOKE I ADMIRED SO MUCH AND I COULDN'T GET OUT OF MY MIND.

 

JUST MY SORT  AND WELL BACK  HOME THESE TYPE ARE HARD TO FIND.

 

I WOULD WALK ROUND THE POOL ADMIREING AND GIVING A GLANCE OR TWO.

 

ON THE SECOND DAY MANY OF THEM HAD GONE BUT THIS ONE STILL THERE.   WHOO-HOO !!

 

LONGING TO TOUCH AND  PUT MY ARMS ROUND BUT TOO MANY PEOPLE IN SIGHT .

 

THINKING MAYBE I MIGHT GET A CHANCE IF I HUNG AROUND ONE NIGHT.

 

THE SUN IT WAS GETTING HOTTER AND I WAS AS I LAY THERE .

 

I HAD VISIONS OF BEING HOME TOGETHER WITH ME LOUNGING IN MY DECKCHAIR.

 

I NEVER SPOKE A WORD AT ALL JUST ADMIRED AND GAZED ALL DAY.

 

THINKING I BET THERES LOTS THAT ADMIRED AND I HAD NO CHANCE IN A WAY.

 

I DID LEARN FROM OTHER HOLIDAY MAKERS THAT THIS HUNK ALWAYS LAZED ROUND .

 

AND ANOTHER ONE ALSO WHICH HUNG AROUND ACROSS THE POOL ON THE GROUND.

 

SO I WONDERED OVER THAT WAY ONE MORNING JUST TO TAKE A LOOK.

 

AND THERE BELOW A PINAPPLE TREE WOW I WAS AMAZED AND JUST SHOOK.

 

WITH EXICTEMENT AS BACK HOME IN ENGLAND THERE WERN'T NO HUNKS LIKE THIS.

 

LYING IN MY GARDEN WITH ONE  I IMAGINED WOULD BE JUST BLISS.. HE-HE.

 

IT HAS GOT TO BE MINE I THOUGHT TOMYSELF AND PARNER KEPT LOOKING AT ME.

 

WATCHING ME ADMIRE THIS HUNK  TILL ONE DAY HE SAID TO ME.

 

HAVE YOU GOT EYES FOR ANOTHER AND I HAD TO TELL HIM THE TRUTH.

 

I SAID WELL ONE IS ENOUGH REALY BUT TWO WOULD REALY PROVE.

 

MUCH MORE SATISFACTORY DON'T TELL ME YOUR  ANGRY NOW PLEASE.

 

I'M ONLY ADMIREING I KNOW I CARN'T HAVE DON'T BICKER I WANT SOME PEACE.

 

THE HOLIDAY WEEK IT PASSED BY QUICKLY SO ON THE VERY

 LAST DAY.

 

I PLUCKED UP COURAGE AND WENT DOWN ALONE AND A LADY PASSED  BY MY WAY.

 

WOULD YOU TAKE MY PICTURE PLEASE WITH THAT HUNK THERE DON'T LET ANYONE SEE.

 

WITH MY ARMS AROUND IT WHILE IT'S QUIET AND SO OFF I

TIP-TOED QUICKLY.

 

NOT A SOUND I MADE AND SPREAD MY ARMS THE LADY SHE SNAPPED AND LAUGHED.

 

I'VE ADMIRED IT TOO SHE SAID AND OFF I RUSHED LAUGHING KATH.    HE-HE.

 

I MUST ADMIT IT WAS FUN WITH MY ARMS ROUND AND I LAUGHED AS SHE TOOK THE PIC.

 

IT WAS QUIET AND THERE WAS KNOWONE AROUND SO I DIDN'T FEEL A TWIT.

 

WELL WHAT DO YOU THINK TO MY LOVELY TANNED HUNK

 ISN'T IT JUST WHAT I NEEDED.

 

BIG AND STRONG AND VERY GOOD LOOKING ARN'T I GLAD  I SUCCEEDED.

 

IN GETTING MY PICTURE TAKEN TOGETHER ON MY HOIDAY IN GREECE AT THAT TIME.

 

WE LOOK GREAT TOGETHER DON'T WE IN THE PICTURE  IN   "  MY SIMPLE RHYME ".

 

 

                                                    HE-HE-HE !!!!

 

                        BIG, STRONG AND GOOD LOOKING.

                                 

                                                                      

                                   SCROLL DOWN                

 

 

 

               

 

                  

 

               

 

 

 

    I BET YOU COULDN'T WAIT TO SEE COULD YOU

                                         !!!

 

 

 

" CHRISTMAS SHOPPING 1979 "

                                                  

               

 

 

CHRISTMAS APPROACHING 1979 AND THE WEATHER WAS COLD AND BLEAK.

 

ME AND PARTNER WENT SHOPPING OUR LAST THINGS FOR CHRISTMAS TO SEEK.

 

ALL ROUND THE LOCAL TOWN WE SHOPPED BUYING IN GOODS AS YOU DO.

 

AS I THINK THERE IS ALWAYS SOMETHING AT THE LAST MINUTE COMES TO YOU.

 

THREE PAIRS OF SLIPPERS FOR THE CHILDREN AS AT CHRISTMAS I ALWAYS BOUGHT NEW.

 

ONE PINK NIGHTDRESS FOR TINY DAUGHTER  PYJAMA'S FOR 2 SONS  IN  BLUE.

 

I ALWAYS LIKED THEM TO HAVE NEW NIGHTCLOTHES ON CHRISTMAS EVE EACH YEAR.

 

DON'T ASK ME WHY I ALWAYS DID THIS IT JUST BROUGHT ME LOTS OF CHEER.

 

FROM HERE WE DECIDED ALL AT ONCE OH LETS HAVE A REAL CHRISTMAS TREE .

 

SO OFF WE WENT TO THE GARDEN CENTRE WITH ALL OUR BAGS HIM AND ME.

 

EVERY SHOP WINDOW WE PASSED WAS SO LOVELY ALL LIT UP FESTIVE AND BRIGHT.

 

IT WAS LATE AFTERNOON  BY THIS TIME SO TWINKLING LIGHTS WERE  IN SIGHT.

 

AS WE GOT NEAR THE GARDEN CENTRE CAROL SINGERS WERE ALL AROUND.

 

IT WAS SUCH A PEACEFUL SIGHT THAT EVENING AND WHAT A BEAUTIFUL SOUND.

 

WE CHOSE OUR TREE AND OFF WE SET TO GO TO MY SISTERS THEN.

 

AS AT THIS TIME WE USED TO WATCH EACH OTHERS CHILDREN SO WE WENT FOR THEM.

 

SHE WAS BABYSITTING DAUGHTER AND TWO SONS AS I HAD WATCHED HERS THE NIGHT BEFORE.

 

IT WAS GOOD WE COULD WATCH ONE ANOTHERS WE NEVER WANTED FOR MORE.

 

WE WERE ABOUT TWENTY MILE FROM HOME THAT NIGHT AND THE TRAFFIC WAS REALY BUSY.

 

PEOPLE WERE LEAVING WORK IN THE CITY AND I WAS IN KIND OF A TIZZY.

 

PARTNER SAID WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU WHY CARN'T YOU RELAX.

 

I SAID BECAUSE I AM FULL OF PAIN IF YOU WANT TO KNOW THE FACT.

 

FULL OF PAIN HE SAID WELL WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY BEFORE WE RODE OUT SO FAR.

 

BECAUSE I WANTED TO GET YOU THAT PRESENT I PROMISED FOR THE CAR.

 

AND WE HAVE STILL TO COLLECT IT YET HE HAD NO IDEA WHAT IT WAS.

 

AS I WAS GOING TO THE STORE MYSELF WHILE HE WAITED THERE BECAUSE.

 

ME NOT BEING ABLE TO DRIVE THEN  I NEEDED HIM TO TAKE ME THERE.

 

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THE  PAIN GOT STRONGER AND I WAS GASPING FOR AIR..

 

GOOD GRIEF HE SAID I'LL HEAD TO YOUR SISTERS AS SOON AS THIS TRAFFIC EBBS.

 

SO I LAID DOWN ON THE BACK SEAT IN AGONY THEN SHOUTED NO YOU BETTER HEAD.

 

FOR THE HOSPITAL RIGHT AWAY PLEASE I CARN'T GO NO LONGER LIKE THIS.

 

THE PAIN IS TERRIBLE AND I NEED SOME HELP YOUR GIFT I WILL HAVE TO MISS.

 

SO HE DROVE AT SPEED AND WE ARRIVED AT THE HOSPITAL ONLY JUST IN TIME.

 

I WAS TAKEN IN AND LED TO A BED AND EVERYTHING TURNED OUT FINE.

 

I DIDN'T MANAGE HIS SUPRIZE PRESENT BUT WHAT I DID MANAGE THAT NIGHT.

 

WAS TO PRESENT HIM WITH OUR  NEW BABY SON  HE WAS SO FULL OF DELIGHT.

 

SO ALL IN ONE AFTERNOON I HAD SHOPPED AND BOUGHT A CHRISTMAS TREE TOO.

 

THEN WE WENT HOME THE VERY SAME EVENING WITH OUR BABY SON DRESSED IN BLUE.

 

I THOUGHT I WOULD SHOW YOU HIS PICTURE JUST LOOK AT HIS FAT CHEEKY CHOPS.

 

PARTNER SAID NEVER MIND THE OTHER GIFT THIS ONE FOR ME IS THE TOPS HE-HE.

 

THE PICTURE WAS TAKEN WHEN WE GOT HOME AND THE LABEL THATS  FADING AWAY .

 

IS THE ONE THEY PLACE ON THE BABY'S COT AND I STILL HAVE IT TO THIS DAY.

 

I WAS TOLD NOT TO HAVE MORE CHILDREN AFTER THE BIRTH OF MY GIRL.

 

BUT WE HAD WAITED THREE YEARS FOR OUR OWN CHILD SO THIS LITTLE BOY WAS OUR WORLD.

 

EVERYTIME I GO SHOPPING NEAR CHRISTMAS MY MEMORY FLOATS BACK TO THIS TIME.

 

AND HERE BELOW IS MY PARTNERS GIFT  PLACED HERE IN "  MY SIMPLE RHYME "

 

                               

                                 HE-HE HE ISN'T HE FUNNY !!!

 

 

 

 

 

                          

                         

 

WELL WE'RE HALF WAY THROUGH NOVEMBER FRIENDS SO I HAD A THOUGHT YESTERDAY .

 

TO START ON MY SIDEBAR FOR CHRISTMAS TO MAKE IT BRIGHT AND GAY..

 

I CARN'T PUT THE MONTH OF DECEMBER IN YET BUT I FELT IF I DID A SPREAD.

 

OF A FEW NICE CHRISTMAS GRAPHICS HERE I MIGHT GET INTO MY HEAD.

 

IT'S GETTING CLOSER EACH WEEK FRIENDS AND  I CARN'T GET INTO THE SWING.

 

OTHER YEARS AT THIS TIME I'VE FINISHED  WITH EVERYTHING..

 

I KNOW SOME START TOO EARLY WITH CHRISTMAS DECOR AND OTHER THINGS.

 

BUT WHEN I READ 40 DAYS TO CHRISTMAS PANICK FOR  ME SET IN.

 

I DON'T WANT TO LEAVE IT  ALL TOO LATE AS THEN IT WILL  BE ALL RUSH.

 

SO MAKING A START ON MY JOURNAL I THOUGHT MIGHT JUST GIVE ME A PUSH.

 

THERES  ALL THE SHOPPING FOR FOOD AND  NEW CLOTHES AND  PREZZIES  IT MAKES ME FROWN.

 

FOLKS RUSHING HERE AND THERE LIKE MADMEN WHEN YOU GO INTO TOWN..

 

SO WHEN I'D DONE MY SIDEBAR I WAS FEELING MORE IN THE SPIRIT.

 

SO I 'M GOING TO TOWN WITH MY WHEELBARROW NOW AND I'M HOPING I'M GOING TO FILL IT. HE-HE.

 

IV'E MADE  A LIST OF ALL THE FOOD  THAT FRIENDS AND FAMILY LIKE.

 

I'M A BIT DISSAPOINTED I HAVE A PUNCURE THOUGH ON MY UNICYCLE BIKE.

 

                                       

                       

SO I CARN'T RIDE DOWN TOWN AND PARK UP TODAY IT'S REALY BUGGING ME.

 

NOT TO WORRY IF I CARN'T SAVE MY LEGS I'LL  SAVE ON  MY ARMS A BIT YOU'LL SEE.

 

I WAS GOING TO BUY  A MOBILITY SCOOTER BUT I CARN'T FIND A MODEL THEY  SELL..

 

WITH A STEERING WHEEL ON WHICH I'D HAVE LIKED SO THATS OUT NOW AS WELL.   HE-HE.

 

WELL I'VE   SETTLING FOR MY  WHEELBARROW AT LEAST MY ARMS WON'T ACHE.

 

IT'S VERY LIGHTWEIGHT AND JUST THE JOB FOR TRANSPORTING THINGS HOME TO TAKE.

 

BUT I BET I HAVE A BIT OF A DO  WITH THE CASHIERS  WHEN  I GO ROUND .

 

I'LL TELL THEM IT DOESN'T TAKE ANY MORE SPACE THAN A MOBILITY SCOOTER  I'VE FOUND.. HE-HE

 

AND I'M ALSO THINKING TO TRIM IT  UP TOO WITH A BIT OF CHRISTMAS CHEER.

 

IT WILL CARRY A FEW LARGE BOTTLES OF WINE AND ALSO A FEW CANS OF BEER.

 

MAYBE A BOW ON THE HANDLES OR A NICE  BIG SHINY BRASS BELL.

 

WELL I LIKE TO FEEL IN THE SPIRIT AT CHRISTMAS AND OTHER TIMES AS WELL.

 

CAN YOU ALL SEE ME DRESSED IN MY SANTA HAT MARCHING BY THE SEA ON THE PROM.

 

MY BELLS RINGING  ON MY WHEELBARROW THEY'LL WONDER WHAT PLANET I'M FROM.

 

                                         HE-HE.

 

OH! LET THEM THINK  WHAT THEY WANT MY FRIENDS IT'S BETTER THAN  BROKEN ARMS.

 

FROM CARRYING ALL THOSE HEAVY  BAGS  AND MY TURKEY TOO FROM THE FARM.

 

OH! YES IV'E TO CALL AT THE FARM AS WELL CHRISTMAS IS NOW IN MY BONES.

 

I HOPE MY WHEELBARROW TYRE DON'T PUNCTURE LIKE MY UNICYCLE HAS BACK HOME..

 

IF IT DOES I'LL CALL AT THE GARAGE AND ASK THE GUY THERE  POLITE .

 

WILL YOU BLOW MY  WHEELBARROW TYRE UP PLEASE I BET HE THINKS WHAT A SIGHT .. 

 

HE-HE.

 

I NEED IT IN PERFECT CONDITION I'LL SAY BECAUSE WHEN  I LEAVE HERE NOW.

 

IT'S GOING TO BE CARRYING A LOT OF WEIGHT AS I'VE YET TO BUY HALF A COW.     HE-HE

 

WHEN I GET THERE I'M HOPING THERE PARKING SPACE STILL HAS A WHEELBARROW RAMP.

 

WHOOPS !!!!  IT SAYS CARTS ONLY  I HOPE I  DON'T GET CLAMPED.  HE-HE

 

YOU SEE ROAST BEEFS A FAVOURITE OF OURS  AND AT CHRISTMAS WHEN OUR FRIENDS.

 

CALL IN AND ALL THE RELATIONS ARE HERE THE EATING OF BEEF NEVER ENDS.

 

THEY WANT BEEF FOR DINNER BEEF IN SARNIES AND  BEEF SLICES ON THE BUFFET.

 

SO I NEED HALF A COW AT LEAST MY FRIENDS FOR CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEARS DAY.

 

IT ALSO WORKS OUT MUCH CHEAPER BUT THE PROBLEM  IS CARRYING IT HOME.

 

SO INSTEAD OF THROWING IT OVER  MY SHOULDER  IT WILL SIT IN MY BARROW NO MOANS.  HE-HE

 

FROM THERE I'LL BE ON TO THE GARDEN SHOP FOR A FIR TREE TO POP ON TOP.

 

THERE VERY HANDY ARE WHEELBARROWS WHEN YOU WANT A VERY LARGE SHOP.

 

I WENT IN MY BEST GREEN WELLIES  COS IT LOOKED A BIT BLACK DID THE SKY..

 

WELL AT LAST I'VE LANDED BACK SAFE  NOW FOLKS IT FEELS GOOD TO BE HOME AND DRY.  

 

VEGETABLES BEER WINE AND TURKEY PLANTS HALF A COW AND MY TREE.

 

I TOLD YOU MY WHEELBARROWS HANDY AND IT'S TRIMMED UP WITH  BELLS TOO    HE-HE !!!

 

ARE YOU IN THE CHRISTMAS SPIRIT YET ? IF NOT DO THE SAME AS ME.

 

COME ON AND TRIM YOUR SIDEBAR UP NOW FOR ALL  J/LAND TO SEE.

 

THEN GET YOUR SHOPPERS OUT MY FRIENDS  AND TRIM THEM ALL UP TOO.

 

YOU HAVE GOT TO HAVE FUN  AT CHRISTMAS AND BE JOLLY NOT FEELING BLUE.

 

I KNOW YOU THINK I'M A NUTTER BUT IT'S BETTER THAN BEING A BORE..............

 

OH! AND I BOUGHT A NEW SHINY CLEAVER TO DO  MY  COW CHOPPING CHORE.

 

WELL I'M OFF TO PUT MY WHEELBARROW AWAY NOW AND CHOP UP THE COW IF IV'E TIME .

 

I HOPE MOTHERHENS MADE YOU CHUCKLE AGAIN  HERE IN  "MY SIMPLE RHYME"

 

 

                                                       

                                            

       THIS WHEELBARROW WEIGHS A TON LOL!!

                                                               

                               HE-HE !!!!

            WATCH THIS SPACE!!

 

 

  " IT'S PREZZY AND CHRISTMAS OUTFIT SHOPPING NEXT "

 

 

             

                         

            

 

 

 

                 

                                            

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"HOW I HAVE BEEN IN THE NIGHT"

 

         

                  

I THOUGHT I WOULD WRITE YOU AN UPDATE FRIENDS OF HOW I HAVE BEEN IN THE NIGHT.

 

I WOKE UP AT 2AM THIS MORNING  MY STOMACH WAS FEELING SO TIGHT.

 

PAINS WERE SHOOTING EVERYWHERE I COULDN'T EVEN SIT.

 

I FELT TO BE IN LABOUR AND SHOUTED OUT THIS IS IT.

 

THE BABY'S DUE AND READY I CALLED OUT TO ROOSTER MY MAN.

 

EITHER THAT OR AGAIN MY STOMACH DIDN'T LIKE THAT FRANZIPAN.

 

FOR YOU OUT THERE IN USA A FRANZIPANS A SMALL CAKE.

 

WITH A PASTRY CASE AND FILLED UP WITH MIXTURE THEN YOU SIMPLY BAKE.

 

MARZIPAN IS THE FLAVOURING AND I JUST LOVE THEM SO.

 

WELL LAST NIGHT BEFORE BEDTIME I HAD ONE SO I KNOW.

 

IT WOULD HAVE BEEN  THAT BECAUSE MY FRIENDS IT SEEMS EACH TIME I EAT.

 

THESE CAKES I HAVE TO SIT LOP SIDED ONLY ON ONE CHEEEK.    HE-HE.

 

WELL AS THE PAINS GOT STRONGER ROOSTER WAS SO SCARED .

 

HE MADE MY DRINK BUT THEN AS USUALY HIS OPINION HE AIRED.

 

MOTHERHEN WHY DO YOU EAT THEM WHEN YOU KNOW THEY MAKE YOU ILL.

 

KNOWING THEY WILL CAUSE YOU PAIN AND THEN YOU CARN'T SIT STILL.

 

PACING UP AND DOWN I WAS TRAPPED WIND IS REALY BAD.

 

AND WHEN YOU CANNOT FREE IT YOU FEEL AS IF YOUV'E HAD.

 

A REALY LARGE SHOT OF HELLIUM YOUR STOMACH IT DOES SWELL.

 

THEN I LOOK NINE MONTHS PREGNANT I FEEL LIKE IT AS WELL.

 

MY STOMACHS GETTING BIGGER BUT STILL I TRY TO LAUGH.

 

I SHOUT OUT GET MY PEPPERMINT QUICK WILL YOU FOR LAUGHING KATH.

 

ROOSTER RUNS TO THE DRINKS CABINET AND I SAY PLEASE BOIL THE KETTLE.

 

ADD SOME TO MY CUP OF PEPPERMINT THIS WILL HELP TO SETTLE.

 

OH! NO THE PAIN IS HERE AGAIN QUICK THE BABY'S COMING.

 

PAINS AGAIN SHOOT EVERYWHERE AND SOMETHING IT IS RUMBLING .

 

ROOSTERS LOOKING WORRIED HE'S FLAPPING HERE AND THERE.

 

HALF ASLEEP HIS FACE IS DRAWN HE'S ANGRY BUT I KNOW HE CARES.

 

HE SAYS IF YOU BRING ANYMORE FRANZIPANS INO THIS FLAT AGAIN.

 

THERE GETTING DUMPED IN THE NORTH SEA I AM SICK OF YOU IN PAIN.

 

WHY DO YOU PECK THEM REPEATEDLY HE KEEPS CLUCKING ON AT ME.

 

BECAUSE I LOVE THEM AND THEY TEMPT ME CARN'T YOU FLIPPING SEE.

 

WELL FEATHERS THEY GOT RUFFLED BY THIS TIME IT'S  FOUR 'O'CLOCK.

 

THE BABY IT STILL HASN'T ARRIVED AND HE'S AN ANGRY COCK. HE-HE .

 

STILL THE FLOOR I AM PACEING BESIDES ALL THIS I HAVE GOT.

 

A CHEST INFECTION BOTHERING ME SO I START TO SWAT.

 

WHILE ON THE MOVE I'M STUDYING A RHYME TO WRITE TO YOU ALL.

 

JOTTING DOWN WHILST ON THE MOVE IN AND OUT OF THE HALL.

 

THE PEPPERMINT IT WENT DOWN WELL THEN STARTED TO WORK THROUGH.

 

I CAN HEAR QUITE A WIND GETTING UP TONIGHT ROOSTER SHOUTS CAN YOU. HE-HE.

 

HAVE YOU ANY IDEA AT ALL MOTHERHEN WHEN THAT BABY'S DUE.

 

I'M TIRED OUT AND IV'E TO WORK IT'S ALRIGHT FOR SUCH AS YOU.

 

WELL I KNOW I'M IN THE LATE STAGES BECAUSE THE PAIN IS LOW.

 

BUT IT'S AGONY AND TO THE BATHROOM  NOW I THINK I'LL HAVE TO GO.

 

WELL DON'T LOCK YOURSELF IN HE CLUCKS  LEAVE AJAR THE DOOR.

 

I DON'T WANT YOU HAVING THAT BABY ON THE BATHROOM FLOOR.

 

ALL OF A SUDDEN IT THUNDERS AND MOTHERHEN SHE STARTS TO LAUGH.

 

MY PERSONALITY CHANGES NOW AND I'M NOW LAUGHING KATH.

 

IN THE DISTANCE FROM THE WIND AND THUNDER ROOSTER STARTS TO YELL.

 

I THINK IT  MUST BE LIGHTENING TOO  I DON'T HAVE TO LOOK I CAN TELL.

 

THE GABLE END OF THE FLATS FELL DOWN  IV'E JUST HEARD THE LOUDEST THUMP.

 

AND I DON'T THINK YOUR HAVING A BABY AT ALL I THINK YOU JUST NEEDED TO T- - - - .    HE-HE

 

SO MY PAINS ALL GONE AND I'M FEELING MUCH BETTER BUT THE LABOUR WAS HARD AND CRUEL.

 

SO FOR MOTHERHEN NO MORE FRANZIPANS JUST PENTY OF VEG AND GRUEL.

 

IF THE NEIGHBOURS ASK THIS AFTERNOON IF I HEARD THE THUNDER LAST NIGHT.

 

I'LL ANSWER DID I HEAR  IT ??? I CERTAINLY DID TOO RIGHT.!!!!

 

NOW MY CHEST DOESN'T FEEL QUITE LIKE SANDPAPER AND MY PAINS HAVE EASED TO NIL.

 

AFTER A KIP I MIGHT BE ABLE TO COMMENT NOW AND SIT STILL.      HE-HE.

 

IT'S ALMOST SEVEN  THIRTY AND IT'S FLOWN ROUND TO ROOSTERS WORKTIME.

 

SO I'M  GOING BACK TO NODDY LAND  NOW  IV'E DONE YOU   " MY SIMPLE RHYME"

 

 

(HOPEFULLY  ALL BEEN WELL I WILL BE COMMENTING AFTER LUNCH I AM FEELING BRIGHTER LOL!! ).

 

THANKYOU FOR ALL YOUR WELL WISHES THEY ARE SO MUCH APPRECIATED.