"ABOUT SOMETHING I HAD FOR SALE"

 

   

 

 

I THOUGHT TODAY  I WOULD TAKE YOU BACK  AND TELL YOU ALL A TALE..

 

OF A TIME WHICH HAD ME IN TEARS OF LAUGHTER ABOUT SOMETHING I HAD FOR SALE..

 

I DON'T REMEMBER IF IV'E TOLD SOME OF YOU THIS STORY BEFORE BUT IT'S TRUE.

 

WHEN I USED TO BE A BARMAID BACK THEN AROUND NINETEEN EIGHTY TWO.

 

I REALY LOVED THIS JOB MY FRIENDS AND I  WORKED  EVERY HOUR ROUND MY KIDS.

 

TO EARN THAT LITTLE EXTRA MONEY THEY HELPED OUT THESE  EXTRA FEW QUIDS.

 

ON LEAVING THE PUB IN THE EARLY HOURS OF ONE PARTICULAR  MORN.

 

AFTER WASHING THE GLASSES AND CLEANING THE TABLES I'D RING FOR MY TAXI HOME.

 

I GOT OUT THE TAXI THIS PARTICULAR NIGHT AND THERE ON MY LAWN SHINING BRIGHT.

 

WAS A  FULL SET OF FALSE TEETH GRINNING AT ME IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT .

 

I RAN IN THE HOUSE AND ASKED  MY PARTNER TO GO AND  MOVE THEM AWAY.

 

HE SAID LEAVE THEM THERE THEY WON'T BITE YOU LOVE AND THEY MIGHT CUT THE GRASS FOR NEXT DAY  (HA-HA )

 

WELL AT THIS I ROLLED OVER LAUGHING AND I PLEADED AND PLEADED TO HE.

 

SO HE VENTURED OUTSIDE AT THIS EARLY HOUR IN THE MORNING  JUST TO PLEASE ME.

 

WHEN HE CAME BACK IN I SAID WHERE HAVE YOU PUT THEM AND HE TOLD ME WHAT HE HAD DONE .

 

HE SAID IV'E PUT THEM ON  RODS LAWN NEXT DOOR JUST FOR A BIT OF FUN. HA-HA.

 

ROD WAS OUR NEIGHTBOUR I SAID OH  MY GOODNESS HE'LL GET THE SHOCK OF HIS LIFE.

 

AND WHAT IF LIZ SHE SEES THEM FIRST LIZ WAS OUR NEIGHBOURS WIFE.

 

WHEN WE WOKE IN THE MORNING A KNOCK TO THE DOOR AND ROD WAS STANDING THERE.

 

HE SAID LOOK WHAT IV'E FOUND ON MY LAWN WHEN WE LOOKED WE JUST CRACKED UP AND STARED

 

INSTEAD OF JUST BEING THE SET OF TEETH THEY WERE WRAPPED IN A PLASTIC BAG.

 

AND IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FULL SET OF TEETH A SANDWICH NOW THEY HAD. HE-HE.

 

HAVE YOU ANY IDEA KATH WHERE THEY CAME FROM HE ASKED  I SAID I DON'T KNOW. HA!

 

AND AT THIS I STARTED LAUGHING AGAIN ROLLING ABOUT TOO AND FRO .

 

A MAN CALLED DON LIVED OPPOSITE US AND POINTED UP TO AN HOUSE.

 

WHERE ANOTHER  MAN LIVED WHO WENT OUT PLENTY AND HE LIKED A FEW TIPPLES OF GROUSE.  (WHISKEY)

 

ROD WENT UP THERE AND KNOCKED ON THE DOOR AND HE PLACED THE BAG  ON HIS STEP.

 

AS HE WAS A BIT OF A FUNNY SORT  AND  IF THEY WERE HIS HE COULD COME OUT AND GET.

 

WELL THAT DAY WE'D PLANNED A GET TOGETHER IN MY  FRONT GARDEN IN THE SUNSHINE.

 

ALL OF A SUDDEN A VOICE IT YELLS DOWN ARE THESE BLOODY THINGS YOURS THERE NOT MINE.

 

ROD HE SHOUTS BACK WHAT ARE THEY MATE HE SHOUTS A SET OF BLOODY FALSE TEETH.

 

AND THERE EATING A FLIPPING SANDWICH IS THIS A JOKE ON ME HE SEETHED.

 

OH NO!!  THERE NOT OURS ROD SHOUTS BACK  I HAVE NO IDEA WHO'S THEY BE.

 

WELL COULD YOU DO ME A FAVOUR MATE  AND FIND THE RIGHT OWNER FOR ME.

 

SO THE GUY COMES MARCHING DOWN TO MY HOUSE WITH THE TEETH HANGING THERE IN THIS BAG.

 

THROWS THEM OVER MY GATE TO ROD AND  WASN'T I GLAD THAT HE HAD.

 

OH GIVE THEM ME HERE I SAID TO ROD I'LL GO TO THE SHOP AT THE END.

 

OBVIOUSLY SOMEONES MISSING THEM AND I BET THERE GOING ROUND THE BEND.

 

SO I BOBBED TO THE SHOP AND I SAID CAN I PLEASE PLACE IN YOUR WIDOW AN AD.

 

SHE ASKED WHAT I WAS SELLING I TOLD HER  SOME FALSE TEETH  IN A BAG.

 

COMPLETE WITH SANDWHICH AS WELL JENNIFER SHE LOOKED AT ME THOUGH I'D GONE MAD.

 

AND THERE SAT ON A BUFFET BEHIND  HER WAS HUSBAND WHO LOOKED PRETTY SAD.

 

FALSE TEETH !!  SHE YELLED OUT LOUD TO ME OUR DAVID LOST HIS LAST NIGHT.

 

HE'S BEEN SAT HERE IN THE SHOP ALL DAY HIDING OUT OF FOLKS SIGHT.

 

I SAID WAS HE EATING A SANDWHICH SHE SAID I DON'T NO HE WAS DRUNK.

 

AND HE CAME HOME SMELLING LIKE A DOG OTTER STAGGERING AND HE STUNK.

 

I SHOUTED HOORAY I'M GLAD WE  KNOW NOW WHO THEY BELONG TO AT LAST.

 

YOU SEE I FOUND THEM ON COMING HOME LATE THEY WERE BUSY MOWING MY GRASS.

 

SHE LAUGHED AND LAUGHED THERE WERE TEARS IN HER EYES AND SENT HIM ALONG TO ROD

 

SO ROD SAID NO MORE LEAVING YOUR TEETH ON KATHS LAWN YOU CRAZY DRUNK SOD.

 

HE HAD WANDERED AND GONE THE WRONG  WAY HOME AFTER HAVING A PINT OR TWO .

 

GOT LOST AND FELT THE WORSE FOR WARE AFTER HE'D DRANK THESE FEW.

 

AFTER REMOVING HIS TEETH BECAUSE HE WAS  SICK HE FELL OVER AND SO HE THREW.

 

HIS TEETH OVER MY  GATE ONTO THE GRASS TO PROTECT THEM AS THEY WERE NEW. 

 

HE WAS THINKING IF HE HAD LEFT THEM IN AND THEY HAD DROPPED ONTO THE GROUND.

 

THEY WOULD HAVE SMASHED UP TO PIECES AND TO MEND THEM QUITE A FEW POUND.

 

FROM HERE HE COULD NOT REMEMBER JUST HOW HE MANAGED TO GET HOME.

 

BUT BY THE SOUND OF HIS WIFES TALE HE CERTAINLY MUST HAVE WANDERED SOME FIELDS WHEN HE ROAMED..

 

WHEN  HE WOKE NEXT MORNING HE TOLD HIS WIFE THAT HE COULDN'T REMEMBER WHICH GATE.

 

HE HAD THROWN HIS TEETH OVER OR HOW HE'D ENDED UP SMELLING IN THAT KIND OF STATE.

 

GOOD GRIEF I SAID TO ROD AND LIZ  HE MUST HAVE LOOKED SUCH A SIGHT.

 

AND IF HE SMELLED LIKE A DOG OTTER HE MUST HAVE FELL INTO A PILE OF  - - - - -.HA!

 

THIS STORY I TOLD IN THE PUB THE NEXT NIGHT AND EVERYTIME SOMEONE WENT HOME.

 

I USED TO SHOUT OUT GOODNIGHT AND GODBLESS BUT DON'T LET YOUR FALSE TEETH ROAM  (HAHA)

 

SO THE STORY OF DAVIDS TEETH BEING LOST WAS THE TALK OF THE VILLAGE AT THAT TIME.

 

I'LL NEVER FORGET WHAT I FOUND THAT MORNING HERE IN  "MY SIMPLE RHYME" HA-HA -HA.

 

 

                 ELEPHANTS NEVER FORGET  HE-HE-HE. !!!

 

 

           

 

                              ( THANX TO EMMI FORTHIS GREAT GRAPHIC  )

"MY LITTLE PLOT"

 

   

(THANX TO CHRIS OF CABS CREATIONS FOR THIS LOVELY WINDOW BOX GRAPHIC)

 

 

IT WAS  EARLY MORNING ONCE AGAIN AND I WAS WIDE AWAKE.

 

SO I GOT DRESSED  AND DOWN THE STEPS I WENT OUTSIDE TO TAKE.

 

SOME PICTURES OF " MY LITTLE PLOT " I PROMISED YOU I WOULD DO.

 

TRYING MY HAND AT PHOTOGRAPHY AGAIN  TO TAKE SOME MORE SNAPS FOR YOU (HE-HE)

 

I'M REALY GETTING USED TO THIS I WILL GET THERE SOON I'M SURE.

 

AS EACH PICTURE I AM TAKING SEEMS BETTER THAN BEFORE.

 

HERES A TINY  EUONYMUS SHRUB WHICH IV'E STARED OFF NICE AND SMALL.

 

WHEN IT GETS MUCH BIGGER I'M GOING TO REPOT IT AS I WANT IT PRETTY TALL.

 

 

I STUCK LITTLE ELMA FUDD INSIDE AS  HE'S CUTE AND FUNNY TOO.

 

BUT I DON'T THINK HE'LL FIND BUGS BUNNY AROUND MY FLAT AT ALL  DO YOU.

 

I AM GOING TO POT THEM ON YOU SEE INTO A BIG LARGE TUB WITH MORE.

 

EVERGREENS AND CONIFERS THE DWARF I'LL BE LOOKING FOR..

 

I ABSOLUTELY LOVE EVERGREENS AS THEY CATCH YOUR EYE ALL YEAR.

 

AUTUMN WINTER SUMMER AND SPRING THERE GREENERY ALWAYS APPEARS.

 

IV'E TAKEN  INTO CONDSIDERATION MY HEALTH AND AGE AS WELL.

 

SO POTS AND WINDOW BOXES WILL DO ME AND I THINK THEY'LL LOOK JUST AS SWELL.

 

NO MORE DIGGING OR WEEDING JUST THE ODD SPRAY HERE AND THERE .

 

THEN SAT IN THE SUN WHEN WE GET SOME I CAN JUST REALAX AND STARE.

 

HERES A WINDOW BOX I STARTED FIRST EARLY BACK IN JUNE .

 

I'M AFRAID WITH ALL THE RAIN WEV'E HAD THOUGH THEY ARE BLOOMING TOO SOON.

 

I LIKE MY FLOWERS TO LAST ME ALL YEAR WELL THAT IS WHAT I TRY TO PLAN.

 

SO I DON'T USUALY POT UP THINGS LIKE THIS UNTIL EARLY JULY IF I CAN.

 

THE REDS ARE DOUBLE BEGONIAS AND I CROPPED THIS PIC FOR YOU.

 

TO SHOW YOU HOW BIG THE HEADS ARE FLOPPING OVER THE LOBELIA BLUE.

 

IN THE PAST TIMES THEYV'E BEEN  LARGE AS SAUCERS AS YOU CAN CLEARLY SEE.

 

THESE ARE  BLOOD RED  WITH BLUE LOBELIA THAT WILL SOON BE TRAILING  FREE.

 

 

 

 

 

THEN I HAD A SMALL BASKET WHICH SOMEONE BOUGHT ME WITH FLOWERS IN THERE.

 

SO WHEN THE FLOWERS DIED OFF I PLANTED IT WITH A GERANIUM AND HUNG IT MID AIR .

 

I BOUGHT A LITTLE NOVELTY BEE AND STUCK HIM IN THE TOP. HA!

 

HE BOUNCES AROUND WHEN THE WIND BLOWS I HOPE HE DON'T BOUNCE OUT THE POT HA!

 

 

I BOUGHT  QUITE A NICE LARGE TUB THEN AND PLANTED PELARGONIUM PURPLE AND WHITE.

 

ADDED A FEW OF EVERTHING ELSE SO THAT SHOULD BE NICE AND BRIGHT.

 

BELOW IS A POT OF LIZZIES COLOURS IN ABUNDANCE YOU CAN GET.

 

AS LONG AS I KEEP NIPPING THE HEADS OFF IN NOVEMEBER THEY'LL BE STILL FLOWERING I BET.

 

 

THEN CAME AN HALF MOON BASKET WHICH I HAD FROM MY LAST HOME I FOUND.

 

SO I FILLED THIS WITH DOUBLE BUSY LIZZIES AND IVY TO HANG TO THE GROUND.

 

 

PEOPLE PASS BY AND HAVE COMMENTED HOW LOVELY THEY LOOK MY POTS..

 

MUCH MORE BRIGHTER  AND GAY THEY SAY THAN BEFORE I TOOK OVER THIS PLOT.

 

DO YOU REMEBER ME SAYING I WAS GIVEN THE CHANCE TO DO THIS.

 

WELL IT DOESN'T TAKE UP MUCH OF MY TIME AND IT'S HELPED SINCE MY GARDEN I MISS.

 

I PEBBLED THE FLOOR SO NO DIGGING AND DRILLED A  BORDER OF WOOD AROUND.

 

TO STOP THEM FROM SCATTERING EVERYWHERE  AND THEY LOOK TIDY ON THE GROUND.

 

 

 

 

I'VE WASHED  MY MR HEDGEHOG AND HE'S GOING TO  TAKE PRIDE OF PLACE. 

 

HE'S LOOKING SO PROUD AS HE STANDS THERE NOW  WITH HIS CURIOUS POINTED FACE.

 

HE CAME ALL THE WAY FROM SPAIN TO ME WHEN MY GRANDSON BROUGHT HIM ORE.

 

IN HIS SUITCASE FOR MY BIRTHDAY HE WAS WRAPPED UP IN TOWELS GALORE. HA!!

 

WELL AT LEAST HE LANDED SAFELY AND HE WASN'T BROKEN AT ALL.

 

AND WHEN I SAW THE SIZE OF HIM I WAS EXPECTING A HEDGEHOG SMALL.

 

HERE HE IS WHEN I'D WASHED HIM ALL READY TO TAKE HIM DOWN.

 

TO PLACE OUTSIDE IN BETWEEN THE POTS AND CEMENT HIM TO THE GROUND.

 

 

 

ALL THE VISITORS WHO PASS DO TELL ME NOT A HEDGEHOG LIKE THIS HAVE THEY SEEN.

 

ANYWHERE IN THE GARDEN CENTRES OR ANY GARDENS THEY'VE  BEEN.

 

SO I TELL THEM NO THEY PROBABLY WON'T AS HE FLEW  OVER IN A PLANE.

 

ALL THE WAY FROM GIBRALTA SO I DON'T THINK THEY'LL SEE ONE THE SAME.

 

CAN YOU SEE THE GARDEN FORK AND HE ALSO HAS SOMETHING ELSE.

 

YES SOME STRAWBERRYS THEREON THE FLOOR AT HIS FEET SOMETHING I LOVE MYSELF.

 

ANYWAY FRIENDS THEN ANOTHER TWO BASKETS I MADE TO HANG FROM  THE WALL.

 

I PLACED THEM EACH SIDE OF OUR ENTRANCE AND MIXED THEM WITH FLOWERS LARGE AND SMALL .

 

 

 

SO I'M HAPPY WITH WHAT I HAVE DONE SO FAR IN MY LITTLE PLOT TO BLOOM.

 

I JUST WISH  NOW  WE ARE INTO  JULY THE SUN WOULD HURRY UP SOON.

 

I AM SURE THEY WOULD HAVE BEEN PRETTIER BUT THEY HAVE HAD TO TAKE SOME STICK.

 

WITH ALL THE RAIN AND FLOODS WE HAVE HAD IT MAKES THEM GROW FAR TOO QUICK.

 

I BOUGHT YESTERDAY A WELCOME SIGN  IN THE SALE AND I THINK IT LOOKS  NICE .

 

A KNOME WHO'S SWINGING ON A TREE SO FOR FOR FIFTY PENCE I DIDN'T THINK TWICE . HA!!

 

 

 

I'VE PLACED HIM ON THE DOOR AT THE BOTTOM JUST SO I CAN LET.

 

FOLKS ALL KNOW THEY ARE WELCOME WELL HOW FRIENDLIER CAN  YOU GET.

 

SO WITH HOUSE WORK AND J/LAND AND " MY LITTLE PLOT " I COULD DO WITH EIGHT HANDS SOMETIMES.

 

LIKE OSCAR MY SIGGY  HERE BELOW DEBB MADE ME FOR  " MY SIMPLE RHYME"

                                                HE-HE-HE.

 

                          THANX TO DEBBIE OF DeB'S DaBS

 

         FOR MY LITTLE FRIEND OSCAR I HAVE NAMED HIM.

 

                                              HE-HE-HE..

 

 

         

 

"WHAT THE NEXT DAY BRINGS"

 

                        

RED AND YELLOW AND PINK AND GREEN ORANGE AND PURPLE AND BLUE.

 

I CAN SEE A RAINBOW SEE A RAINBOW CAN YOU SEE ONE TOO.

 

ON OPENING MY WINDOW YESTERDAY MORNING A DOUBLE RAINBOW I SPIED.

 

OF BEAUTIFUL COLOURS IN THE SKY SO I  GRABBED MY CAMERA AND TRIED.

 

TO TAKE  THE PERFECT PICTURE BUT ACTUALLY THERE WERE TWO.

 

RAINBOWS WITHOUT AN ARC THERE FALLING DOWN FROM THE SKY SO BLUE.

 

I THINK YOU'LL JUST MAKE THE SECOND ONE OUT ON THE RIGHT IN THIS PICTURE I TOOK.

 

YOU WILL SEE HOW LOVELY THE LARGE ONE IS WHEN YOU ENLARGE FOR A CLOSER LOOK.

 

 

THE BASE OF IT SEEMED ENORMOUS DIPPING  INTO THE OCEAN OUT THERE.

 

IT WAS REALY WIDE AND I JUST SAT THERE I COULDN'T DO NOTHING BUT STARE.

 

THERE HAD BEEN NO RAIN THIS SUNNY MORN AND SO  I JUST WONDERED WHY.

 

A DOUBLE RAINBOW SHOULD SUDDENLY APPEAR THERE BEFORE MY EYE.

 

THE LARGE ONE WAS JUST AMAZING IT WAS BEAMING OH! SO BRIGHT.

 

THE COLOURS WERE OH! SO VIVID IT WOULD HAVE LIT UP THE TOWN AT NIGHT.

 

THE BRIGHTNESS DAZZLED YOUR EYES AT TIMES IT ALSO LIT UP THE SEA.

 

IV'E SEEN LOTS OF RAINBOWS IN MY TIME BUT THIS ONE SHONE BRILLIANTLY.

 

I DON'T THINK IV'E EVER SEEN ONE SO BRIGHT AND COLOURFUL LIKE THIS ONE BEFORE.

 

I STOOD AT THE WINDOW WATCHING FOR AGES AS IT SHONE DOWN  ON THE SEASHORE.

 

IT HUNG THERE FOR OVER TWO HOURS I THOUGHT IT WOULD NEVER GO.

 

EVEN THE SECOND ONE SEEMED TO SEND LIGHT OUT THOUGH IT DIDN'T SHOW.

 

THE LARGE ONE MUST HAVE SPANNED SIX FEET WIDE AT THE BASE AS IT REACHED THE SEA.

 

SO TRYING TO FOCUS THE CAMERA TO GET THEM BOTH IN WASN'T EASY FOR ME.

 

IF YOU LOOK ABOVE AT THE FIRST SNAP AT THE SUN SHINING DOWN ON THE WALL.

 

BUT THE SUN DIDN'T SHINE LIKE THE RAINBOW NOT HALF AS BRIGHT AT ALL.

 

 

 

MY PICTURE DOESN'T DO IT JUSTICE I WAS WISHING THAT I WAS A PRO.

 

AT TAKING PICTURES PROFFESIONALLY AND THEN IT WOULD REALY SHOW.

 

AT FIRST I THOUGHT IT A MYSTERY IT APPEARING THERE OUT OF THE BLUE.

 

AS I OPENED MY WINDOW THIS SUNNY MORN  IT SOMETIMES CONFUSES YOU.

 

THEN I THOUGHT  MAYBE A HEAVY STORM  HAD BEEN OUT THERE AT SEA.

 

I JUST HAD THE STRANGEST FEELING  WHEN THIS RAINBOW SHONE RIGHT AT ME.

 

OH! WELL I TRIED A PICTURE FOR YOU I'M SURE I WILL GET THERE ONE DAY.

 

WITH PRACTICE I'M SURE I'LL GET BETTER AT THIS TO SHOW YOU OF THINGS DOWN MY WAY.

 

PLEASE IGNORE THE DATE AGAIN I STILL HAVN'T CHANGED IT YET.

 

THIS CAMERA WILL PROBABLY BE DISGARDED BEFORE I GET THAT DONE I BET. (HE-HE)

 

I THINK I WILL TREAT MYSELF TO A NEW ONE FOR MY  USA HOLIDAY TIME.

 

THEN I CAN TRY SOME PROFESSIONAL PICS TO PLACE HERE IN

" MY SIMPLE RHYME "

                                      

 

THANX TO DONNA OF D'S DESIGN FOR THIS GREAT GRAPHIC LOL!!

 

         

 

          I'LL BE A PROFESSIONAL THEN    HE-HE-HE

                   

            

"MY LITTLE TRIP OUT"

I WOKE UP YESTERDAY MORNING TO A BEAUTIFUL CLEAR BLUE SKY.

 

WASN'T THAT A JOY TO SEE FROM THE RAIN THATS BEEN CATCHING MY EYE.

 

I DECIDED TO GO FOR A RIDE IN THE CAR  AND TAKE A PICNIC SOMEWHERE.

 

BUT FIRST A FEW SNAPS FROM MY WINDOW I TOOK OF THE YATCHS SAILING THERE.

 

 

 

 

DOESN'T IT LOOK A  RELAXING SPORT I WISHED I WAS SAILING WITH  THEM.

 

BUT DECIDED TO PACK A COOLER BAG TO FIND SOME PLACE GREENER THEN.

 

I SOON  CAME ACROSS A SMALL VILLAGE SO PRETTY IT WAS WITH A POND.

 

WITH THIS KIND OF SCENERY I'M IN MY GLORY AND I LOVE TO BE AMONG.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

BELOW IS THE SIGN ON THE PAVEMENT THE NAME OF THE LANE I WAS AT.

 

AN OLD GENTLEMAN TOLD ME THE STORY OF WHY IT HAD BEEN CALLED THAT.

 

APPARENTLY ALL OF THE VILLAGES SO MANY YEARS AGO.

 

ONLY OWNED ONE  COW EACH AND THIS VILLAGE THEY BROUGHT IT TO SO.

 

THEY COULD MILK ALL THE COWS TOGETHER  AND ALSO THERE USED TO BE.

 

MANY A HOODED CROW HE SAID AND THATS HOW THE NAME CAME TO BE.

 

 

"HODDY COWS LANE" HOW INTERESTING IT'S  A WALKERS PARADISE.

 

JUST UP THE LANE THROUGH THE WOODED AREA THERE BEFORE YOUR EYES.

 

IS AN INLET FOR BIRDWATCHING LOVERS AND THE CLIFFS LEADING DOWN TO THE SHORE.

 

ALSO OF COURSE A BEAUTIFUL WALK AROUND THE VILLAGE AND  MORE.

 

I SPOTTED THIS LITTLE CHURCH THERE STANDING PROUD UPON THE HILL.

 

THEN DARK CLOUDS STARTED TO ROLL BY AGAIN THE SKY THEY ALL DID FILL.

 

 

 

CAN YOU SEE THE BELL TOWER THE OLD GENTLEMAN WAS SAYING TO ME.

 

HIS LATE FATHER USED TO TOLL THE BELL THE LOCAL VICAR HE USED TO BE.

 

A SUNDIAL IN THE WALL IS AN ANCIENT MASS CLOCK.

 

AND STONES FROM A DANISH ALTER IN THE WALL ACROSS.

 

IT IS ONE OF THE ODEST CHURCHES IN YORKSHIRE TODAY.

 

AND THE FONT IS SAID TO BE AS OLD AS THE SAXON DAY.

 

SO I SAT IN THE CAR EATING MY LUNCH  WHEN I SPOTTED THIS COUPLE STOOD THERE.

 

THEY HAD JUST GOT BACK FROM THE WALK AROUND AND THEY TOLD ME TO BE PREPARED.

 

IT WAS VERY HILLY AND TIRING SO I DIDN'T BOTHER  TO  GO.

 

I JUST TOOK A STROLL ROUND THE DUCKPOND AND TOOK THIS SNAP TO SHOW.

 

 

 

THE COUPLE WHO HAD  DONE ALL THERE  WALKING  LOOKING TO SEE WHERE NEXT.

 

I WAS MORE INTERESTED IN THOSE BLACK CLOUDS AND I WAS FEELING QUITE PERPLEXED.

 

WERE THEY GOING TO GET CAUGHT OUT IN ANOTHER STORM I THOUGHT.

 

MY SUGGESTION WAS TO GO ON HOME TO THEM  I REALY THOUGHT THEY OUGHT.

 

SO THIS MORNINGS RHYME  I HOPE YOUV'E  ENJOYED AND MY PICTURES ALSO LIKE I.

 

ENJOYED THE SUN YESTERDAY MORNING WHEN I WOKE  TO A BRIGHT BLUE SKY.

 

ON TRAVELLING HOME THE HEAVENS OPENED UP AND DOWN CAME THE RAIN ONCE AGAIN.

 

HAILSTONES AND HEAVY RAINDROPS LASHING THE CAR WINDOW PANE.

 

STILL I HAD SET OFF EARLY SO I CAUGHT THE BEST OF THE SUN.

 

AND ENJOYED THE RIDE OUT TO THE VILLAGE AND BY THAT TIME THE DAY ALMOST DONE.

 

I WAS HAPPY WITH MY LITTLE RIDE OUT AND THE LOVELY PLACE I HAD BEEN

 

SO I SETTLED DOWN IN THE KITCHEN  THEN TO EAT MY STRAWBERRYS AND CREAM LOL!!

 

IT WASN'T FAR FROM MY HOME TOWN SO I SUPPOSE I AM GRATEFUL THAT I.

 

HAVE THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS NEAR AT HAND WHEN THE SUN SHINES DOWN FROM THE SKY.

 

 

 

 

 

PLEASE IGNORE THE DATE ON THE PICS I AM NOT VERY GOOD AT THIS.

 

CHANGING IT EVERY TIME I GO OUT SO PLEASE JUST GIVE THAT A MISS.

 

WELL FRIENDS UNTIL ANOTHER TRIP OUT I'LL LEAVE YOU UNTIL NEXT TIME.

 

AND HERES THE CROPPED PICTURE OF  "HODDY COWS LANE" PLACED HERE IN.

 

                      "MY SIMPLE RHYME".

 

    KATH  ASTORIASAND

 

 

      

  THANX TO DEBBIE FOR THIS LOVELY GRAPHIC BELOW. LOL!!

 

  

         

       

"THE ENVELOPE WAS TOO LARGE"

 

      

WELL MY FRIENDS IT SEEMS THAT KATH IS DOING SOME COMPLAINING AGAIN.

 

VERY SIMILAR TO WHAT I DID ABOUT THE RATS WE HAD WITH THE RAIN.

 

I GOT UP EARLY THIS  MORNING TO A CARD IN THE BOX FOR MY MAIL.

 

SO HERE I AM YES ONCE AGAIN TELLING YOU ANOTHER  TALE.

 

A FRIEND HAD WROTE ME A LETTER LAST WEEK WHICH I WAS WAITING TO ARRIVE .

 

I WENT TO MY MAIL BOX EVERY DAY BUT HER LETTER WASN'T INSIDE.

 

MY FRIEND HAD POSTED THIS LETTER  OUT LAST THURSDAY BY EARLY FIRST CLASS.

 

SHE INFORMED ME INSIDE THE LETTER A QUESTION SHE HAD TO ASK.

 

SO I WAITED TILL WEDNESDAY MORNING AFTER FIVE DAYS NO LETTER ARRIVED.

 

I COULDN'T BELIEVE WHEN I CHECKED MY MAIL BOX THERE WAS STILL NOTHING THERE INSIDE.

 

I RANG MY FRIEND AND I ASKED HER ARE YOU SURE YOU SENT IT FIRST CLASS.

 

OH! I'M POSITIVE KATH BUT DON'T WORRY IT WILL TURN UP SOMETIME LASS.

 

GIVE IT A COUPLE OF MORE DAYS SHE SAID THERE REALY IS NO RUSH.

 

SO THIS I DID BUT NOTHING ARRIVED SO AGAIN I BEGAN TO FUSS.

 

THEN WHEN I LOOKED THIS MORNING  I HAD RECEIVED THIS LITTLE CARD.

 

FROM THE GENERAL POST OFFICE TELLING ME TO GO ALONG TO THERE YARD.

 

TO COLLECT THE LETTER OF MINE WAITING THERE AND COULDN'T BELIEVE WHAT I READ .

 

WITH AN EXTRA  CHARGE OF ONE POUND AND SIX PENCE THE LITTLE CARD IT SAID. 

 

THE ENVELOPE WAS TOO LARGE IN SIZE BY ABOUT AN EIGHTH OF AN INCH.

 

A FIRST CLASS STAMP DIDN'T COVER THE POSTAGE SO THEY DECIDED MY MONEY TO CLINCH.

 

IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN SIX PENCE MORE SHOULD THE POSTAGE SO THEY WOULDN'T DELIVER IT HERE.

 

AND A CHARGE OF ONE POUND AND SIX PENCE ALSO  TO PICK IT UP I FEAR..

 

MY BLOOD BOILED  I WAS SO  ANGRY IT WAS NOT THE AMOUNT TO PAY.

 

IT WAS THE THOUGHT OF ALL THE PROFIT THAT THEY ALL MAKE TODAY .

 

WE HAVE TO SIZE OUR ENVELOPES NOW GET THEM WIEGHED AND PAY THE RIGHT FEE.

 

IF NOT IT WILL NOT BE DELIVERED AND YOU HAVE TO COLLECT  IT LIKE ME.

 

PLUS THE EXTRA  AMOUNT AS WELL AND I THOUGHT WHAT IF I HAD LIVED .

 

OUT OF WALKING DISTANCE AND CATCH A BUS OR BEEN  INVALID..

 

THE PHONE CALL CHARGE YOU MAKE TO FIND OUT IF YOUR LETTER HAS ACTUALLY  BEEN SENT .

 

THEN THERES  THE DISTANCE TO TRAVEL AND HOW MUCH BUS FARE ONE HAS SPENT.

 

SO I RANG THE LOCAL POSTMASTER AND I SAID I WANT TO COMPLAIN.

 

THIS WAS ONLY AN ORDINARY LETTER NOT A PARCEL YOUR'E SUCH A PAIN.

 

I PRETENDED I WAS AN INVALID AND THIS JOURNEY IS VERY LONG..

 

HE REPLIED WELL THE SENDER  SHOULD MEASURE HER MAIL BEFORE SHE SENDS IT ALONG. 

 

WE'VE  NEVER HAD TO DO THIS BEFORE DON'T YOU THINK IT IS ALL A BIT MUCH.

 

NO HE REPLIED IT'S GOVENMENT RULING AND ALL THAT  STUPID STUFF.

 

I WAS GETTING WOUND UP BY THE MINUTE AND I HAD REALY HAD ENOUGH.

 

I REPEATED IT'S SUCH A LONG WAY FOR ME  I WANTED TO SAY OH! GET S- - - - - - .  ( HE-HE).

 

CARN'T I HAVE IT RE-DELIVERED AND PAY AT MY DOOR  AT ALL.

 

WELL YOU CAN BUT THEY'LL BE ANOTHER CHARGE AND IT WON'T BE VERY SMALL.

 

IF YOU CALL BRING SOME IDENTIFICATION A PASSPORT OR SOMETHING LIKE THAT.

 

RING THE BELL ON THE DOOR IN THE BACK YARD AND SHOW IT TO THE POST CHAP.

 

AS LONG AS IT HAS YOUR PICTURE ON AND ADDRESS THAT IS ALL WE NEED.

 

YOUR ONE POUND AND SIX PENCE EXTRA AND YOU CAN THEN HAVE YOUR LETTER TO READ.

 

WELL IF I'M COLLECTING THE LETTER MYSELF WHY DO I PAY A CHARGE.

 

A ONE HOURS RETURN WALKING JOURNEY TO COME ALONG TO YOUR YARD.

 

MEASURE MY ENVELOPES BEFORE I SEND AND GET THEM WEIGHED FOR THE MAIL.

 

GOOD GRIEF I THINK I AM DOING YOUR JOB AND IT'S YOU THAT GETS FLIPPING PAID.  (HE-HE).

 

SO IT TOOK ME THIRTY FIVE MINUTES OR MORE TO WALK TO THE POST OFFICE FOR

 

MY FRIENDS LETTER AND  PAY MY DUES AND DEMANDS  AND EVERYTHING ELSE AND MORE.

 

WHAT DO YOU THINK THIS WORLD IS COMING TO HAS EVERYTHING JUST GONE MAD.

 

NOTHING SEEMS FAIR TO ME TODAY AND THE GREED IN THIS WORLD IS SO BAD.

 

ALL FOR AN ENVELOPE BEING ONE EIGHTH OF AN INCH TOO FLIPPING WIDE.

 

THERE WASN'T A LETTER IN MY MAIL BOX WHEN I WENT AND LOOKED INSIDE.

 

SO I SUPPOSE I THINK IN THE FUTURE IT WILL HAVE TO BE E. MAIL NOW.

 

BUT ME AND MY FRIENDS WE LIKE TO RECIEVE A LETTER THROUGH OUR BOX SOMEHOW.

 

RESTRICTIONS AND RULES AND REGULATIONS I AM SICK OF THEM ALL THE TIME.

 

THE NEXT RULE WILL BE AOL'S EXTRA CHARGES FOR WRITING " MY SIMPLE RHYME".

 

                   GRRRRRRRRRRRRR

                     

                              SO THIS

 

LEO THE LION WAS SO VERY ANGRY

                 

 

THANKYOU TO SUGAR FOR THE LOVELY TAGS.!!

"LAST WEEK IT WAS TIME TO CELEBRATE"

 

 

      

LAST WEEK IT WAS TIME TO CELEBRATE SO I DECIDED TO HAVE A DRINK.

 

MY YOUNGEST SON SAT HERE WITH ME PASSED  HIS TEST SO IT MADE ME THINK.

 

TWAS  A GOOD EXUSE TO HAVE A TIPPLE AS I SAT HERE BY MYSELF.

 

SO I OPENED UP MY DRINKS CABINET TO SEE WHAT WAS ON THE SHELF.

 

WHOOO!! -HOO  THERE WERE LOTS OF BOTTLES ALSORTS I COULD SEE.

 

AND WHEN I GOT THIS PHONE CALL THE WEATHER WAS BUGGING ME.

 

THEY GET TO ME ALL THESE DOWNPOURS AND MORES DUE ON THE RANGE.

 

SO I THOUGHT OH BLOW IT KATH MY DEAR HAVE A LITTLE DRINK FOR A CHANGE.

 

THERE WERE BLACK BOTTLES GREEN BOTTLES RED ONES ALSORTS IN MY SIGHT.

 

I DIDN'T KNOW WHICH TO CHOOSE MY FRIENDS SO I SETTLED FOR SOME OF THE WHITE.

 

I GOT MY GLASS AND FILLED IT UP TO CELEBRATE HE HAD PASSED..

 

ONLY SMALL TOTS HONESTLY SO I KNEW I WOULDN'T GET GASSED. (HA-HA)

 

IT'S ONLY ONCE IN A WHILE KATH DEAR GO ON AND GET SOME DOWN.

 

WELL THE RAIN WAS LASHING AND THE WIND WAS BLOWING SO I COULDN'T GET INTO TOWN.

 

I  HELD UP MY GLASS AND TOASTED I SAID "CONGRATULATIONS" SON

 

I HAV'NT HAD A DRINK FOR AGES SO YOUR MUM IS HAVING FUN. 

 

GO ON KATH HAVE ANOTHER ONE AND SO AGAIN  I TIPPED THE GLASS.

 

WHOO-HOO I WAS REALY PLEASED THAT DAY MY SON HAD PASSED AT LAST.

 

MY COMPUTER THEN STARTED PLAYING ME UP IT BEGAN TO GO FUZZY AND BLURRED.

 

AND WHEN I TYPED ON THE KEYBOARD  IT WOULDN'T SPELL THE RIGHT  WORD.

 

OH DEAR I WILL HAVE TO SEND FOR SOMEONE I THOUGHT WHATEVERS WRONG.

 

WHEN ONE OF MY NEIGHBOURS PASSED MY DOOR HE SAID THATS A LOVELY SONG.

 

I COULD HEAR YOU AT THE BOTTOM OF THE STEPS AND I HAD TO HAVE A LAUGH.

 

SOMEONE SOUNDS TO BE ENJOYING THEMSELVES I BET IT'S LAUGHING KATH.

 

I WAS HAPPY HE LIKED MY SINGING SO I SANG LOUDER AT THE TOP OF MY VOICE. HE-HE. 

 

I WANTED EVERYBODY TO KNOW  THAT THIS DAY  I HAD TO REJOICE.

 

SINGING MADE ME MORE THIRSTY SO I TOOK ANOTHER SIP.

 

WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN MY COMPUTER CHAIR WENT INTO A DOUBLE FLIP.

 

MY LEGS WENT UP IN THE AIR MY FRIENDS  I WONDERED WHERE I WAS. 

 

AND THEN I REALISED MY BALANCE HAD GONE AND ALL OF THIS BECAUSE.

 

 

MY YOUNGEST SON HAD PASSED HIS TEST AND I WANTED TO CELEBRATE.

 

I NEVER THOUGHT IT WOULD END LIKE THIS BUT THE FEELING IT WAS GREAT. (HA-HA).

 

JUST LIKE HUMPTY DUMPTY WHEN HUMPTY  FELL OFF THE WALL

 

I CALLED FOR ALL THE KINGS MEN BUT NOT ONE OF THEM  CAME AT ALL

 

I DIDN'T HURT MYSELF VERY MUCH  IT FELT LIKE A CAROUSEL RIDE.

 

TILL I WOKE UP NEXT  MORNING AND SAW MY FLIPPING BACKSIDE. (HA-HA)

 

IT WAS BLACK AS COAL I TELL YOU  WITH A LITTLE BIT OF YELLOW MIXED IN.

 

GOOD GRIEF I BET THAT LEMONADE BOTTLE WAS FULL TO THE TOP WITH GIN  (HA-HA).

 

I KINDA THOUGHT IT WAS STRONGER  THAN IT USUALLY TASTED MY FRIENDS.

 

BUT STILL I ENJOYED MY TIPPLES AND NO I'M NOT GOING TO PRETEND.

 

IT'S YRS  SINCE I HAD A FEW STRONG DRINKS SO IT REALY MADE A NICE CHANGE.

 

CHOOSING WHICH ONE I WANTED FROM THAT LOVELY COLOURED RANGE.

 

WELL I'M OK NOW AND DECIDED I AM JUST GOING TO CALL MY SON.

 

AND ASK HIM TO TAKE HIS ADVANCED TEST AND IF HE PASSES I CAN HAVE SOME MORE FUN  (HA-HA)

 

HOORAY !!!  MY SON HAS PASSED HIS TEST SO I HAVE A GOOD FEELING SOMEHOW.

 

I WILL SEE A LOT MORE OF HIM AROUND AS HE'LL DRIVE DOWN TO SEE ME NOW.

 

ANOTHER MEMORY FOR MY BOOK WHEN MY SON PASSED HIS DRIVING TEST.

 

AND HIS MUM HAD A FEW LITTLE TIPPLES AND GOT A BRUISE  WHICH WAS ONE OF THE BEST.(HA-HA)

 

MUMS  PROUD OF YA SON FOR PASSING NOW CAN I HAVE YOUR  L PLATE SIGN.

 

TO PLACE HERE ON MY COMPUTER  CHAIR WHEN I WRITE "MY SIMPLE RHYME.  (HA-HA)

 

 

                       SONS BABY BELOW

    WHO HE GOT FROM A SHELTER

       YRS AGO AWWW LOVE HIM!!

 

           

 

                                   HE-HE-HE

 

 

            

           

I WAS AWARDED THIS FABULOUS ROCKER AWARD WHEN I CAME ONLINE  TODAY.

I NEVER EXPECTED ANYTHING LIKE THIS BUT IT REALY MADE MY DAY.

AWARDED FROM ONE OF OUR BLOGGERS YES SUGAR WE ALL KNOW HER WELL.

SHE IS ONE COURAGEOUS LADY AND I DON'T THINK I NEED TO TELL.

HOW KIND OF HER TO AWARD ME THIS AND SHE'S ASKED ME TO DO THE SAME.

TO FIVE MORE LADY BLOGGERS SO READ ON AND FIND YOUR NAME.

MY FIRST AWARDS TO A LADY WHO CANNOT BE WITH US RIGHT NOW.

IT'S MARIE  SO  PLEASE TRY AND VISIT HER AND YOU WILL FIND OUT HOW.

TO COOK SOME LOVELY RECIPES AND HER TALES YOU WILL WANT TO HEAR MORE.

SO GIVE HER ALSO A BIG SUPRIZE WHEN SHE 'S BACK HOME ON FRIDAY I'M SURE.

MY SECOND AWARD GOES TO JAN I FEEL WHO'S BLOG IS SO VARIED AND SO.

SERENDIPITY SHE CALLS IT AND OH! I JUST LOVE IT SO GO.

ALONG WHEN YOU CAN FIND TIME MY GILRS AS A ROCKER SHE CERTAINLY IS.

AN INTRESTING MODERN DRESSED PENSIONER HAS A PUPPY TOO WHO'S CALLED KIZ. (for short)

MY THIRD AWARD GOES TO ALLY I  HAVE ALWAYS LOVED ALLY'S BLOG.

AND WHEN SHE GETS TIME OUT FROM COMMENTING I LOVE TO SEE PICS OF HER DOGS.

BARNEY AND NIN ARE SO FUNNY THEY GET UP TO ALSORTS ITS TRUE.

AND A WONDERFUL LADY I THINK SHE IS WITHOUT A DOUBT THROUGH AND THROUGH.

MY FOURTH AWARD GOES TO CHRIS WHO I THINK DESERVES THIS AWARD AND MORE.

SHE HASN'T HAD THINGS SO EASY JUST LATELY BUT I KNOW SHE'LL GET THERE FOR SURE.

SHE'S BATTLING TO TRY AND STOP SMOKING AND LOTS OF OTHER THINGS TOO.

SO PLEASE GO ALONG AND GIVE HER SUPPORT I KNOW SHE'LL BE GRATEFULL TO YOU.

LAST BUT NOT LEAST MY FIFTH AWARD GOES TO ONE BRAVE LADY WHO  I.

THINK INSPIRES EVERYBODY IN J/LAND SHE CAN MAKE YOU LAUGH AND CRY.

A REAL SUVIVOR AND WARRIOR I KNOW YOU WILL KNOW WHO I MEAN.

YES IT'S KIM OF COURSE AND LETS CONTINUE TO PRAY AND TELL HER HOW STRONG SHE HAS BEEN.

IF I'D HAVE BEEN DOING THESE  AWARDS MYSELF I THINK I'D HAVE CHOSEN TEN.

AS I LOVE EVERY JOURNAL I VISIT AND I'D HAVE PROBABLY INCLUDED SOME  MEN  (HA-HA)

AS THERES LOTS OF BLOGS OUT THERE MY FRIENDS SO IT'S SIMPLY TOO HARD TO SAY.

WHICH FIVE FROM ALL OF THE BLOGS IN J/LAND  BUT  IV'E TRIED TO PLEASE SUGAR TODAY.

BEFORE I GO I WANT YOU  TO KNOW YOU ARE ALL VERY SPECIAL TO ME.

AND I AM SO GLAD I JOINED J/LAND AS IT'S  SET MY DEPRESSION FREE.

IT'S BEEN HARD MAKING CHOICES THIS MORNING HAVING FIVE OF YOU ONLY  TO CHOOSE.

BUT IN MY MIND NONE OF YOU BLOGGERS HAVE ANYTHING TO LOSE.

YOU ARE ALL STARS IN YOUR OWN RIGHT AS IV'E OFTEN SAID MANY A TIME..

SO GO ABOVE AND CLICK ON MY FIVE  NAMES WHO IV'E PLACED IN MY   " MY SIMPLE RHYME" 

BEFORE YOU LEAVE AND  RIGHT CLICK  MY GIRLS TO TAKE YOUR AWARDS AWAY.

MAY I ASK YOU KINDLY TO VISIT  ( post)  BELOW AS  IT'S JOSEPHS BIRTHDAY TODAY..

                              "THANX A MILLION."